Here, you'll learn how to comfort someone over text.
If you want to know how to text a girl or how to talk to a girl over text, then there will come a time when she experiences a crisis. If that happens, you will need to provide some emotional support. As an expert conversationalist featured in places like EliteDaily, I know how to comfort someone with words.
Ready? Let's begin.
How To Comfort Someone Over Text
To comfort someone having a difficult time, you'll need to provide them with emotional support. There are different ways to do this: you can send a condolence message for their loss, provide some comforting words, be there for your loved one during a tough time, or, as a last resort, convince them to seek out professional help. However you want to do it, the important thing is that you must provide them with social support and help them overcome their grief and emotional pain. If you can't do that in person, then you can do it over text message, where the most important step is to offer comforting words to help them heal.
Steps to Comfort Someone Over Text Using The RUOK Method
There are many different ways to comfort someone over text messages - but choose the wrong one, and the person you're trying to comfort may be worse off than when they started. If you need to learn how to cheer someone up, I recommend the RUOK method, a series of steps and guidelines that will guide you to find the right solution. First, you need to know how to start a conversation with the person who needs comfort - get them to open up and confide in you their feelings. Afterward, all you need to do is use the RUOK method to help you find the best solution.
Step #1: Recognize the problem.
Before you can even help them with their problem, you need to know what that problem is. If you want to know how to comfort someone with words, you'll need to start there. Start getting them to open up - gently, not forcefully. It may take some time and effort, but if you can soothe the person effectively enough that they're willing to tell you their problems, it can help you find the problem and start looking for a solution.
Step #2: Understand how to best help.
Anyone can provide help; finding out the best way to help is the difficult part. If you've managed to locate the problem, you should think carefully about how to proceed. Have you encountered the situation before and overcame it? The same method could help them overcome it, too. But if you've never been in that situation before and don't know what to do, it's best to seek out someone who has, and ask them for advice. It's better to take your time trying to find a solution rather than wing it and potentially worsen the situation.
Step #3: Offer a listening ear.
When someone has a big problem, it can be a great comfort to have someone who listens and lets them vent it all out. Offer your listening ear to them, and let them pour it all out. While this happens, you should try not to interject as much as possible - simple silence and an understanding nod will suffice. If they suddenly stop talking in the middle of their venting, that's when you should say a few words and let them know you're still listening.
Step #4: Keep it about them.
It's their problem, so the conversation should only be about them. Don't try to steer the conversation towards you or how you feel - it can make them feel like their problems are invalidated. Let them have the floor when you're talking with them, and only talk about other things if that person specifically asks about them.
6 Things To Avoid When Trying To Cheer Someone Up
Just as there are many different ways to cheer someone up, there are also many ways to do the exact opposite. If you're trying to comfort someone over text or otherwise, then these are the things to avoid when trying to cheer someone up. Tread lightly, recognize these guidelines, and you should have an easier time comforting your friend.
#1: Don't push your friend to experience things they don't want, like going to a party if they have social anxiety.
If you think purposefully bringing your sad friend into a happy situation against their will will make them happier, you're mistaken. Don't force their mood to improve by making them do something they wouldn't. It'll only give them a hard time. Keep them in their comfort zone - it'll improve their mental health faster.
#2: Don't interrupt them as they talk - focus on being a good listener.
To be a good listener, you shouldn't interject every so often just to comment on what you think about their problems. You should be patient and listen, only talking when they ask something of you. Wouldn't you feel worse if you were talking about your problems and someone kept interrupting you?
#3: Don't invalidate their feelings or be insensitive.
The worst thing to do is to make them feel like their feelings and problems aren't valid. They are in a sensitive state, and you must be similarly sensitive about their feelings if you want them to feel better. Don't make a thoughtless, insensitive remark, and do not tell them that they shouldn't feel the way they do.
#4: Don't talk about how wonderful your days have been.
The worst thing to do is gush about your happy time to your grieving friend. They've been having a bad day and don't want to hear about all the different ways it could be better. Don't try to be negative, but don't be overly positive, either.
#5: Don't assume they want to be left alone. On the other hand, don't assume that they want your company all the time.
When it comes to comforting someone, making assumptions can be extremely risky. If you assume they want to be left alone, they may end up feeling lonelier and sadder. On the other hand, if you stick to them like glue, they'll feel suffocated and can't properly sort out their problems. It's a delicate balancing act - you'll want to be there for them when you can but also give them enough time to think about their problems. A safe way to do this is to recognize they have a problem, offer them a listening ear, but only come to them when they ask.
#6: Avoid Emojis (Unless Appropriate)
If you know your friend is feeling bad, try to avoid sending emojis over text messages. Using them will make your sad friend feel even worse because it seems like you're not taking their situation seriously. After all, emojis tend to be cutesy and light-hearted - the opposite of how your friend feels.
Help Someone Feel Better With Inspirational Quotes
Words have power, and when you're trying to make someone feel better over text, words are all you have. Finding the right words can be tough, and if you're not particularly skilled with them, you could get stuck. That's why you should research some inspirational quotes - someone likely expressed what you think better than you have. The quotes will help you discover how to help a friend feel better.
"Where there is no struggle, there is no strength." - Oprah Winfrey
Without hardship, there is no success. Reminding the person that what they're experiencing is something to overcome may give them perspective on their problems. If they see it as just a wall to climb, they may feel better knowing they'll be better off afterward.
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." - Maya Angelou
Human memory is limited, and the longer we live, the harder it is to retain them. However, what isn't easy to forget is your feelings and how you felt when someone did something. Even if the actions and moments get lost in time, it'll be hard to forget how those actions made you feel. When you text them this, you are reminding them that while everything else may be forgotten in time, they'll never forget their feelings - and that includes happiness for when they overcome their problems.
"It is never too late to be what you might have been." - George Elliot
Time travel is impossible, but that doesn't mean we can't go back in time to what we once were. And that includes the person we were before our problems hurt us. You can become the happy person you once were as many times as you like.
"A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles." - Christopher Reeve
Heroes aren't intrinsically special beings who can do anything they want with ease. Heroes are born as ordinary people, live as ordinary people, and continue to live despite the overwhelming obstacles on their path. Anyone can be a hero as long as they keep going, no matter the odds.
"Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it." - Hellen Keller
The world is full of pain and troubles, but it also provides us with the means to overcome it all. If, in their sadness, they start to think the world is only there to hurt them, remind them that the world is also there to give them the strength to overcome that hurt.
Frequently Asked Questions
After reading this article, you should know much more about comforting someone over text message. Have any more questions? These frequently asked questions have been answered to give you a better clue.
Why is the ability to comfort someone so important?
Having the ability to comfort someone is important because, without it, you're helpless to watch as all of your friends and loved ones spiral deeper into depression. Even if you don't have the ability at first, as you try and try again to help others, eventually, you will gain it.
How can I encourage a friend via text message?
To know how to comfort someone over text when they are tired, some comforting words will perk them back up. Sending some comforting words and offering to listen to what they have to say will make them feel like they aren't alone. Words of encouragement, even if you only encounter them through text, can be of great comfort, which will help them feel much better.
Can I make someone feel better with lyrics?
Songs are made up of words, and words have a lot of power. Most modern lyrics talk about common problems and how people overcome them - so if you find some lyrics that accurately sum up a friend's situation, then texting them to that person may help them feel better. Especially if you encourage them to listen to some uplifting music through said lyrics.
Should I try to cheer someone up?
It is better to try than not to try. Just remember to respect their boundaries: if they want to be alone and don't want to be cheered up, back off.
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Knowing how to comfort someone over text when they feel lonely can be helpful, especially if you can't be there for them in person. With the combination of knowing the right words to say, offering them your attention, and a little bit of problem-solving, you can be the one who cheers them up.
Make sure to take the right steps, and you'll be able to help people feel better even if they're miles away!