So, you want to know how to make up after a fight with your girlfriend? You've come to the right place!
As a relationship expert featured in places like Shondaland and UpJourney, I'm the one you go to when you need relationship advice. So if you want to know how to make up after a big fight, or how to get a girl back, I'll be your couples counselor and help you two find a conflict resolution.
Trust me? Then dive in.
How To Make Up After a Fight With Your Girlfriend
So, you want to know how to make up after a bad fight.
You've had heated arguments and disagreements before, but maybe this one's a particularly nasty fight. In the worst cases, she may even be giving you the silent treatment, or there is constant fighting. In that case, a simple apology won't be enough.
If you want to be a good boyfriend and make up after a huge fight, you'll have to try different things. Fortunately, there are ways for any couple to stop fighting and go back to having a healthy relationship. And as a relationship expert, I've learned plenty of tips and methods to help you make up after a fight. Here they are.
1. Express How You Feel
Getting to the root of the problem is always the first step in solving an issue. After a huge fight, it's important to discuss the feelings you felt during the argument. Doing so helps couples unravel underlying emotional triggers and process the emotions present in the conflict.
2. Acknowledge Your Role in The Argument
Relationships are a two-way street, even during a heated argument. Acknowledging and taking responsibility for your role in the conflict makes it easier for couples to reconnect and meet halfway. No matter what happens during the disagreement, you should apologize to your loved one.
3. Take Preventive Measures
This step requires couples to establish a more constructive and effective action plan in dealing with future conflicts. Consider what you just learned about yourself and your partner, and devise ways to better appease the both of you the next time you find yourselves on opposing sides.
Communication and compromise are always key to a lasting relationship, and the willingness to build on them is necessary.
4. Acknowledge the Need For Space if Necessary
Trying to apologize soon after a nasty fight is an unwise move. After a big fight, the stress hormones circulate for a while, and negative feelings are still fresh in their mind. Trying to force a conflict resolution will only result in more fighting. Give your partner some space if needed, and wait to apologize until you're sure they've cooled down.
5. Make Future Plans Together
Another way to take preventive action is to plan with your partner what you will do if a conflict arises in the future. A set of rules and guidelines that both of you will follow, even when you disagree with each other, will help resolve the conflict more easily should it happen in the future. With these contingencies in place, even the biggest of disagreements can still be resolved peacefully.
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6 Romantic Gestures That Will Make Her Anger Melt Away
While words may get your feelings across fine, sometimes, she isn't in the mood to listen to them. In that case, all the things you want to tell her, whether it be how you felt during the fight or how sorry you are - won't go through. In that case, you'll need something that speaks louder - actions. These simple but romantic acts will get through to her even if she isn't in the mood to listen and make her anger melt away.
1. Do a chore or task that she hates doing.
Doing something nice for her can help her appreciate you at a time when you've still not made up. Does she have a chore or task that she hates doing but has to do anyway? Take it off her hands a few times. She'll appreciate the fact that you're serious about trying to make it up to her.
2. Buy her favorite meal or comfort food.
Treat her to her favorite things to help her cool down after a fight. It's even better if you make it for her yourself - she'll understand that a lot of love and patience went into making her favorite things.
3. Give her flowers and chocolates.
Really, just give her any gift that she will be happy to get. Whether it's beautiful flowers, sweet chocolates, or even a designer handbag, she'll know you went through all that trouble to get her something.
4. Make her breakfast in bed.
It's every couple's dream situation. You make your other half a delicious breakfast that they can eat in the comfort of their own bed. It takes preparation and timing, but if you can manage it, she'll be so happy to experience it.
5. Take her out on a surprise date.
This will only work if she's ready to listen, so help her cool down first with one of the things above. Ask her to come with you or to a specific spot, and take her out on a surprise date. She may be a bit distant at first, but as you talk to her and try to be a good boyfriend to her, she may slowly open up and relax.
6. Hug and kiss her.
Simple and straight to the point, but never a bad thing to do. If you truly do love her and want to make up with her, give her a hug and a kiss. It becomes easier to forget about the whole fight you were having if you give her the affection she wants and needs.
5 Ways To Prevent Fights With Your Girl From Escalating
There are ways to prevent fights from happening, but sometimes, you're already in too deep to back out. In that case, the next best thing to do is to prevent a bad situation from getting worse. If you're fighting with your girlfriend and you have the frame of mind to realize you don't want it to get any worse, try recalling these helpful tips on how to prevent the fight from escalating.
1. Take a breather and collect your thoughts.
It's easy to get heated, angry, and sensitive during a heated argument. Letting yourself get swept up in the heat of the moment will only make things worse. So, if during a fight, you enter a frame of mind where you recognize this, you should focus on trying to calm yourself down. Start by getting away from the fight for a few moments, and take deep breaths. Take this time to collect your thoughts. Then, when you're calmer, try to figure out what you want to do. If you approach the fight with a calm and collected frame of mind, you'll be able to prevent it from devolving into petty shouting and arguing.
2. Be more rational than emotional.
While it's easy to let your emotions get the better of you, you should try not to succumb to them during an argument. Without being cold and dulling all your emotions, you should try to approach them rationally and carefully. Recognize the root of the problem, what fault you had for it, and what you can do to fix it. That way, you can minimize the damage the fight will cause.
3. Be empathic and keep an open mind.
When in a fight, we're often fighting for our own side, and that means wrongly putting all the blame on the other party. You should try to avoid seeing everything in black or white. Try to be sensitive to the other's feelings and why they feel this way, and keep an open mind on how you can resolve it. If you don't consider the other's feelings, the fight will eventually lead to a dangerous outcome for you both.
4. Treat her with respect and find a compromise.
During a fight, you should never call her names or insult her. It'll only hurt her feelings and make her angrier. If you can remember this during your fight, you should remember to treat her with respect and dignity and resist the urge to bark back at her. In doing so, you should also try to compromise and find a solution to the fight. It's better to give leeway and compromise than to stay hard-headed and let the argument worsen.
5. Stick to relevant and related issues.
During fights, we get so heated that sometimes, we bring up other things we've looked the other way for and throw them at them. Don't do that. Stick to the topic at hand and resist the urge to blame her for other things. Bringing up this and that will only make the fight harder to unravel.
Frequently Asked Questions
Have some more questions about resolving big fights? I have some more answers ready for you.
Should I always apologize first?
Don't wait for the other party to apologize, even if it's mainly their fault. If you want to make up with someone, you should be the one to open negotiations with them - so it's important to apologize first so that you can come to an understanding later.
How do I know if I still have a chance with her?
At first, she may give you the silent treatment or even ignore you completely. At this point, you shouldn't try to force her to accept your apology. If, after some time, she begins to talk to you again, then it's a sign things can be fixed.
Do girls like being wooed after a fight?
Not immediately after a fight, but rather after some time passes and they've had a chance to cool down. While they may not respond favorably at first, as you become more persistent about trying to do good by her, she may start to open up and accept it.
Does she still love me even after our fight?
Even if you've had a big argument, it's hard to stop loving someone completely. There are still lingering feelings, like love, that make us want to get together again. However, just because she may still love you doesn't mean you should think she'll always come back to you even if you do nothing. Effort is important when trying to make up with someone.
More Awesome Article To Explore
Interested in more articles about relationships or impressing girls? We've got plenty of them for you.
- Got a crush on someone but find yourself stammering when trying to approach them? Here's an article on how to talk to your crush.
- Need advice on being good with girls? Try these articles on how to impress a girl or the best ways to approach a girl now.
- Finally, want her to be the one head over heels for you? Here's an article on how to make a girl fall in love with you!
Knowing how to make up after a fight is key to preserving the status of your relationship. After reading this article, we hope you can find a way to compromise with your girlfriend and return to your healthy, happy relationship.