47 Worst Pickup Lines – The only list you’ll ever need!

In a dating culture that’s always changing, you never know when the worst pickup lines you’ve ever heard could come in handy.

Now normally I recommend avoiding pickup lines, and we at Mantelligence have had to seriously ask, “do pickup lines work?”

In short, with more situations than ever to figure out how to flirt with a girl, sometimes a well timed, ironic or hilarious pickup line can be just the thing to break the ice and strike up a conversation.

So whether you want to use some humor in that first DM, or you’re keeping it light flirting with a girl you’ve been talking to a while…these pick up lines options are great!

Contents

8 Best Worst Pickup Lines

Warning: the pickup lines you’re about to read are extremely bad and should never be taken seriously. Use with sarcasm and at your own risk.

Just like the best dad jokes, the best worst pickup lines are so good because of just how bad they are. They can show off your quirky sense of humor, and while they might not work with every girl…

They’ll help you connect with women who have a goofy sense of humor you’ll click with.

Here are the 8 best worst pickup lines:

1. Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for.

Nerdy, bold, and just the worst. This pickup line is great for online dating.

2. Have you ever been arrested? It must be illegal to look that good.

And if she does have a record it just gets that much more interesting.

3. I’ve lost that loving feeling, will you help me find it again?

You’re likely to hear some version of the Righteous Brothers’ “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin‘” at watering holes all over the US. Next time, grab your sweetheart and whisper this one in her ear.

4. It’s handy that I have my library card because I’m totally checking you out.

Bonus points if you use this line on a girl you meet in an actual library.

5. If you were a Transformer, you’d be Optimus Fine.

This one is so bad you just have to laugh at it.

6. If women were boogers, I’d pick you first.

Irreverent and honest, this one pickup line will get you a laugh when you deliver it right.

7. Say, did we go to different schools together?

A bold faced attempt at striking up a conversation. So bold it just might work.

8. Baby, if we came to some agreement you’d be the fine print.

A little clever, a little suggestive. This line could lead to further negotiations.

8 Cute But Worst Pick Up Lines

Do you and your lady have more pet names than a veterinarian’s medical records?

Are you a smooth operator who works cuteness like a pro?

We appreciate relationships of all kinds and we’ve compiled the worst cute pickup lines for all your sappy needs.

So like all the pickup lines on this list, use these sparingly and jokingly. Remember, too much sugar can make you sick.

Here are the 8 worst but cute pickup lines:

9.  You’re so sweet, you’re giving me a toothache.

Maybe use this one a few dates in, after you’ve gotten to an appropriate level of cuteness.

10. Know what’s on the menu? Me ‘n’ u.

It’s got layers, man. No, really this one is so bad.

11.  Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes?

Whatever they are, maybe you could be the one to fulfill them.

12. Did your license get suspended for driving all these guys crazy?

Or for making your heart race?

13. Is there an airport nearby; or is that just my heart taking off?

And oh, the places you’ll go.

14. There must be something wrong with my phone, because it doesn’t have your number in it.

Be sure to laugh this one off. Girls think bashful is cute sometimes.

15.  Were you in Boy Scouts? Because you sure have tied my heart in a knot.

And hopefully she always comes prepared.

16. Are you my high school English teacher’s comments on my essays? Because you have fine written all over you!

Goofy and self deprecating, this pickup line could work with bookish girls and actual teachers.

7 Dumb And Worst Pick Up Lines

Even if you never use them out in the field, knowing some dumb pickup lines is good for a few laughs when hanging with the boys.

Dating should never be taken too seriously, and these awful pickup lines can help remind you that meeting fun people should be fun!

Here are 7 worst dumb pick up lines:

17. You know, I’m not really this tall. I’m just sitting on my wallet.

Again, remember to laugh this one off. This could be especially funny if you’re on the shorter side or after buying a cheap beer at the bar.

18. My doctor told me I’m missing vitamin U. Can you help me?

You could use this one a few days after the first date.

19. I have 4 percent battery remaining. I chose to message you. Did I choose wisely?

When your battery is that low you know its real.

20. Is this the bus stop? ‘Cause I am here to pick you up.

So dumb. Just, really really dumb.

21. Hey, are you a wifi hotspot? Because I feel a connection.

This line could work on a hike or travelling with your girl.

22.  If I could rearrange the alphabet I’d put U and I together.

Nothing like a little old fashioned… alphabet humor?

23. Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?

For when you want to get ultra cheesy.

9 Funny But Worst Pickup Lines

If you’ve ever tried online dating, you know the importance of sending the right signals with your first message.

There are many approaches to the first DM, including using funny pickup lines. We put together a list of the worst funny pickup lines to get her laughing right off the bat, and bring an easy lightness to your inbox.

Here are 9 worst funny pickup lines:

24. Is your last name Campbell? Because you’re mm mm you’re good!

This one can work as a flirtatious compliment at the end of a fun night together.

25. I was blinded by your beauty; I’m going to need your name and phone number for insurance purposes.

This one can work perfectly after doing something goofy like tripping or spilling a drink.

26.  If you were a chicken, you’d be impeccable.

Goofy but unique, just like you.

27. Are you a campfire? Cause you’re hot and I want s’more.

But have can you have s’more if you haven’t had any yet?

28. Go on; feel my jacket. It’s made of boyfriend material.

Perfect if you’ve just offered it to a cute girl on a cold night.

29.  Excuse me. I think you have something in your eye. Nope; it’s just a sparkle.

Yeah it’s corny, but when you’re flirting you can get away with that sometimes.

30. If you were a president, you’d be Babe-Raham Lincoln.

For the civically inclined hookup.

31.  Excuse me do you know how much a polar bear weighs? No? Me neither but it breaks the ice.

*seamless transition into conversation on global warming*

32. Hey, my name’s Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?

Microsoft is cool again, guys.

9 Clever But Worst Pick Up Lines

Clever pick up lines can be a fun way to show off some wit, and while we wouldn’t recommend dropping them on someone out of the blue…

They can be a fun way to flirt with a girl you’ve been talking to, and, with a little imagination, can be used in a number of playful situations. And because these are the worst of the clever pick up lines

They’re playful but proudly cheesy.

Here are 9 worst, clever pick up lines:

33. You’re so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.

This line comes across as both bashful and clever. With any luck you’ll get a laugh and some numbers.

34. Let’s have breakfast tomorrow. Should I call you or nudge you?

Flirty yet considerate, you could drop this one at the end of a great night together.

35. Excuse me. My friend over there is a little embarrassed. He’d like your phone number. He wants to know where he can get ahold of me in the morning.

Not only is a clever way to ask for her number, its so bold it just might work.

36.  On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?

1776.

37. Are you my appendix? I don’t know what you do or how you work but I feel like I should take you out.

Corny but undeniably clever.

38. Are you Bluetooth enabled? ‘Cause I feel like we’re pairing.

These kids and their Bluetooths. Blueteeth? You know what I mean.

39. Screw me if I’m wrong, but you want to kiss me don’t you?

Again, not one I’d break the ice with, but it could do the trick later on.

40.  We’re not socks, but I think we’d make a great pair.

You could even fold up on top of the dryer.

41. I’m sorry, were you talking to me? No? Would you like to?

This one is actually perfect. Confident, clever, and foolproof.

6 Cringy And Worst Pick Up Lines

I don’t know why, but the internet has spoken and you guys are really out here looking for cringy pick up lines.

Maybe you’re all writing teen romance novels or ruining the dates of younger siblings with bad advice, but here they are.

Here are 6 worst, cringy pick up lines:

42. You know, people tell me I look like (insert sexy celebrity here).

Choose someone you look absolutely nothing like. Just for laughs.

43. Did you just fart? Because you blow me away!

I did warn you they’d be cringeworthy.

44. Are you looking for a stud. Well, I’ve got the STD and all I need is you.

PSA: Remember to get tested regularly.

45.  I bet you’ve heard every line in the book. So what’s one more?

And then hit her with another one of the worst pickup lines from this list.

46. Is your father a thief? Because someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.

This one made me cringe so hard m kebr s brken.

47. Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see!

There’s something about those southern girls.

How to Avoid Using The Worst Pickup Lines

Using pickup lines this bad is a true skill. Not just anyone can throw out the worst pickup lines and get away with it.

But with a little work and some guidance, you can drop these pickup lines with enough expertise break the ice or get your crush laughing.

Here is how to avoid using the worst pick up line:

1. It’s better online

The internet being the home of millennial humor, most online daters are going to be internet savvy enough to appreciate the irony and humor of one of these terrible pick up lines/jokes. The interactions are artificial anyway, and these cheesy, ridiculous, cringe-worthy pick up lines make light of that.

The same isn’t necessarily true of these pick up lines for IRL interactions. Yes, they can still be funny and ironic, but you’re much better off making a genuine first impression and striking up a real conversation. They can work great as flirty lines later on, but don’t let your first words be something this bad.

2. Keep it light when using worst pickup lines

When you do decide to pull out one of these dad jokes of the dating world, be sure keep the mood light. There’s no way anyone can take you seriously with these goofy lines, so don’t try and take yourself seriously either.

Make sure you follow these one liners through with a raised eyebrow, a wink, or a laugh… anything to show that it’s all in fun and that you want her to laugh along with you.

3. Read the room

There come moments in every relationship when the right words can make all the difference. Big moments, when the rest of the world falls away and it’s only you and her. In moments like that…

Never use one of these lines.

These are to be used curled up on the couch during a series binge, after a match with a cutie online, or hanging out and comparing ideas with the fellas. So before you use one of these worst pick up lines, make sure nothing important is going on.

Downloadable List of Worst Pick Up Lines

Here is a downloadable List of Worst Pick Up Lines (right click the image and select Save Image As):

More Ways On How To Flirt With A Girl

Looking for more tips to take the stress out of flirting? Check out these other helpful articles:

1. Let us help you understand what women want.
2. Stop making rookie mistakes and start understanding women.
3. Master the skills you need to learn how to talk to girls.
4. Let us decode the mystery and teach you how to flirt with a girl over text.
5. Learn to spot all the signs a girl is flirting with you.

In Conclusion

There you have it, the worst pickup lines you could ever hope to find.

If you use them well, they can be a powerful tool while figuring out how to flirt with a girl. But like with all pick up lines, they need to be used with caution, so be sure to check out this quick read answering the question, “Do pickup lines work?”

So godspeed, and happy flirting!