How to get a girl's number? Getting to know a girl often still comes down that single preliminary question.
Intuitively, we know this is a crucial part of how to get a girlfriend, but for many of us, figuring out how to approach a girl is just plain mysterious.
While we see it done in the movies all the time, for most of us, the question of how to ask for a girl's number is still unanswered.
Or, it was. The truth is, figuring out how to get a girl's number really just comes down to a few steps anyone can follow.
Once you figure out how to approach a girl and a few other key points, it won't be difficult to answer how to ask a girl for her number at all, it'll become second nature.
It turns out, it's not just the guys in the movies who can figure out how to ask for a girl's number, you can too.
Why Is Knowing How To Get A Girl's Number So Important?
We often wonder about how to get a girl's number instead of why, but the why is also important.
Although it has sometimes been portrayed as a cliche, getting a girl's number is still the best way to move from strangers to something more interesting with a girl.
There are several reasons for this.
First of all, getting a girl's number communicates a certain kind of interest to someone you just met. If you ask for a girl's number in a bar or other social setting, you are asking to pursue a romantic interest.
Simply by asking, you're telling her you want to take your new interaction in that direction. That allows her to choose and communicate if she agrees by giving it or not.
Second, the phone, more than ever, is the best way to establish a connection.
The phone nowadays isn't just there to set up a date, it's our central way to communicate with the world. You could build a whole relationship through a phone before ever seeing her again.
And that is the final benefit of figuring out how to ask a girl for her number: there is an inherent suggestion that she wants to see you again. It's an invitation to pursue something more beyond your first interaction.
How to Get A Girl's Number: 7 Steps
When it comes to figuring out how to get a girl's number, it all just comes down to following the right steps and having the right tools available.
If you just follow these 7 steps, you'll manage to get through plenty of interactions with girls and most of them will lead to a new number in your pocket or on your phone.
1. Size Up the Situation but Don't Stare
As in many things in life, preparation is key. While you want to make sure your choice to come over looks natural and in the moment, you also want to gather as much information as you can before you approach.
So, size things up. Learn what you can about her based on what you see (or potentially hear).
The more you know about her before approaching, the more you can prepare yourself (in Step 2) to be interesting to her.
Crucially, though, don't stare and don't spy. A guy who stares and tries to listen in on conversations is not going to come off as an attractive option to give a number to. Be casual, and don't wait all night.
Learn what you can over a brief period and move on to Step 2.
2. Come Up With a Few Potential Conversation Starters and Comments
Once you've picked up all the clues you can, come up with a few ideal comments, questions, and conversations starters to employ in a conversation.
Having a few things to say ready at hand can seriously reduce the nervousness around figuring out how to get a girl's number.
You know you've got a good joke or a great question, so you don't have to worry about blanking and looking like an idiot.
Thankfully, you don't even need to come up with these comments. Mantelligence has all the conversation starters and questions you could possibly need.
3. Approach Her at the Right Moment
Step 3 is one of the two most nerve-racking steps. Every guy really wants to know how to approach a girl right, when really, the answer is quite simple.
First, you need to prepare, and then wait, as casually as possible, for the right moment to appear.
That moment, ideally, is one when she is alone. If you catch her in such a moment, that's the best opportunity.
If she is never left alone, you can still approach her successfully. Just find a moment when their conversation seems to be lagging.
While you can approach at other moments, this is the time that leads to the most success when considering how to get a girl's number.
3A. Know How to Get A Girl's Number When You Have Approach Anxiety
While approach anxiety is a serious problem when you want to know how to get a girl's number, it isn't insurmountable. The truth is, almost all of us are nervous in such moments.
The key is to overcoming this is two-fold:
- Don't try to drink yourself to confidence. Getting drunk isn't likely to improve her perception of you.
- Though, find ways to reinforce your confidence, like friends urging you on and all your preparation.
Then, take a deep breath, and approach. The more you practice, the less nervous you'll be.
4. Start Casually and Be Honest with Her
Once you get past the approach, a lot of the work in how to get a girl's number is already accomplished.
And here, we have a particularly short and simple step: don't rush in with any heavy comments or any lies. Just try to keep her interested with your conversation points developed in Step 2.
5. Lead the Conversation Where She Wants It To Go
Use your questions, starters, and more to lead the conversation, but be receptive to where she wants the conversation to go.
If she changes the topic, don't change it back, adapt your comments to that change. You'll show her you can listen and still have interesting things to say, which is a major step towards solving how to get a girl's number.
6. Let Her Tell You If She Wants to Give Her Number Indirectly
Perhaps the easiest way to avoid or feel more confident about Step 7 is to try to get a hint about whether she wants to give you her number before really asking.
Try to drop a few casual comments into your conversation about links or photos you'd like to share with her and gauge her reaction. If she seems receptive, you have an easy way to move to Step 7.
7. Ask Directly
Finally, after a decent amount of conversation, come out and ask directly for her number. Don't leave any room for her to misunderstand.
Plus, getting a direct "yes" or "no" is always easier to deal with than awkward avoidance of the point.
More Steps On How To Approach A Girl
Figuring out how to get a girl's number involves a lot of skills. If you need more help, try some of our other Mantelligence articles for more expert advice.
- If you're struggling to know what to say after you approach, find out how to talk to girls.
- If phone numbers aren't your thing, find out how to ask a girl out.
- When it comes to sending all the right signs, find out how to flirt with a girl.
When it comes to figuring out how to get a girl's number, it really all comes down to following the above steps.
The next time you're wondering how to ask for a girl's number, remember that the trick isn't so much in figuring how how to ask a girl for her number, but how to build up to asking, making the whole process easier and you much more confident.