Want to learn how to ask a girl out?
With this list, I'll help you find ways to ask a girl out that are most likely to get you a date and help you find that special someone. No need for a dating coach.
Why is Asking a Girl Out So Important?
Every great story has what is known as an inciting incident. It's the moment that gets the hero into the action. It's the start of adventure, growth, and yes... some challenges. Nothing happens, good or bad, without that inciting incident.
Asking a girl out is your inciting incident.
Without taking that step you'll just be waiting around for something great to fall into your lap. And we all know how often that happens.
When you ask her out you take an active role in your own life and your own happiness. Take control of your story and learn how to start dating.
How To Ask A Girl Out On A Date
Attraction is unpredictable. Sometimes it happens immediately, like when you met via a mutual friend. Other times it takes a while to develop, especially if you have social anxiety and fear intimacy.
No matter when you realize you want to be more than friends with this attractive woman, the keys to how to ask a gal on a potential date are the same. That's because the best way to ask out a woman isn't with a pickup line, a handwritten love poem, or any other kind of gimmick.
Learning how to ask a girl out is about learning a method, not memorizing a line or a trick.
Learn to approach the situation in a way that helps you look your best and stop worrying about performing for your crush. With these simple steps, you can feel confident asking her out... no matter how long you've been waiting.
1. Be Selective
The reason the thought of asking a woman out is so stressful is that you risk being rejected. Nobody wants to put themselves out there only to be denied.
To reduce the chance of getting turned down be selective about the girls you ask out. Just like aiming makes it more likely that you'll score, being selective about the girl you ask out makes it more likely she'll say yes.
Ask out the girls you have chemistry with. Does she keep eye contact? Get close to you? Does she seem to enjoy talking to you? These are pretty good signs that you have a connection.
Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t feel a spark with someone or she isn’t showing interest. Some people just don’t click. Figuring this out early will save you frustration later.
2. Give Her a Reason to Say Yes
This may seem basic but it's true...
A woman won't say yes to a guy she doesn't think she'll have fun with.
Once you show her how much fun she'd have on a date with you it's far more likely that she'll say yes. Unfortunately, a lot of guys get so nervous while they're learning how to ask a gal on a date that they forget to let their personalities show through.
This is why a lot of guys think that girls only go after money. Turns out wealth is a pretty good short-term solution for a lack of personality.
While you're gauging her level of interest (see Step 1) show her your sense of humor. Be complimentary. Show her you've got a brain and some interests you'd like to share.
Let her see how much she'd love a few hours alone with you and she'll say "yes" no matter how much you've got in the bank.
3. Be Specific
Once you've found a woman you click with and you've shown her why should say yes, ask her to do something specific.
Asking her to do something specific does a couple of things:
First, this shows her that going out with you would be an interesting experience for her. You know a good restaurant, or you've been meaning to go to this new bar, or you saw that a musician is coming to town soon. It shows her that you have things that get you out of the house and that being with you wouldn't be boring.
Second, it gives her something definite to respond to. Even though it's easy to ask her to "hang out sometime," being that vague means you can't really be sure if she wants to see you just want to end the conversation.
Would you like to get drinks with me next Friday? Now that she can say yes or no.
Be as specific as you can. And if you've chosen the right gal and put your best foot forward you'll end the night with a new date added to your calendar.
Pro Tip: Know The Cute Ways To Ask Your Crush On A Date
One of the major aspects of flirting is a playful, light hearted attitude. It's one of the clearest ways to show a woman your interest in her.
Cute ways to ask a girl out are a great way to keep that playful attitude in her mind as you ask her to see you again. Have her thinking about the special attention you pay her and you'll make her decision a lot easier.
1. Write a note
A handwritten note will bring back all the butterflies of childhood romance. Write her a note on a napkin or slip of paper and “secretly” pass it to her as you’re talking.
2. Bring her flowers
This one takes some planning, so it’s obviously best for a girl you’ve been wanting to ask for a while. Flowers are a classic, thoughtful gesture that is always a good move.
3. Buy Tickets
If you’re trying to figure out how to ask out a girl that you already know, buy tickets to something you know she’d like to do. Show her how well you know her by giving her tickets to a movie, concert, or museum and asking her to go with you.
How To Ask A Girl Out Through Text
Our phones are a powerful means of communication and have changed every aspect of modern life. For better or worse, that includes dating.
That means more relationships are started and maintained through messages, so learning how to ask a female friend on a date over text is a skill every modern man needs.
The beauty of texting is it offers you the chance to think through your message. The downside is that it leaves a lot of room for interpretation.
That's why learning how to text a girl the right way is key to flirting and dating in the digital age.
Allow the mentality is the same as asking a woman out on a date in person, the technique for asking her out over a text message or social media is slightly different.
4. Don’t Wait to Text
In the old days, the rule of thumb was to wait at least three days to call her after you got her number.
We don't live by those rules anymore. You should message her within 24 hours of meeting her. With all the ways we have to stay in touch not messaging her makes it seem like she didn't leave an impression.
Don't worry, she's not expecting a novel or a proposal. Text her something short just to let her know that she's on your mind.
5. Start an Interesting Conversation With Her
Figuring out how to start a text conversation with a girl out of the blue can be really difficult. Especially when you're desperate to talk to her but don't want to let that desperation show. That said, don't immediately send her a date idea to meet in a coffee shop or dinner.
In situations like that text conversation starters are the perfect resource to help you dive into a conversation.
1. What’s the best thing that happened to you today?
Show your interest with a twist on “So, how was your day?”
2. What’s your biggest goal in life right now?
This will help you get to know her better and find common values.
3. If you could go anywhere right now where would you go?
You might just get an idea for a date down the road.
6. Flirt With A Her Over Text
With emojis, gifs, and all the other things we can attach to our messages, there are endless ways to craft flirty texts for her.
No matter how inventive your texting style, learning how to flirt with a girl over text begins with the basics. Get her face to light up every time her phone does with some of these flirty texts.
1. Save me… I’m dying of boredom… can’t work anymore…
This flirty text shows you’d rather be with her at that very moment.
2. What is the first thing that attracts you to a guy?
This question is a set up for a flirtatious conversation you can take any direction.
3. I have to admit, every time my phone buzzes I hope that it’s you.
Let her know you look forward to talking to her and want more in the future.
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Frequently Asked Questions
Still have questions about asking a gal on a date? I'll answer the most asked questions for you.
Is it ok to ask a girl out on text?
Asking a woman out on text is not a new thing, especially with online dating. Ever since the invention of SMS and online messaging apps, like Facebook, Tinder, or Twitter, everyone at one point has flirted and asked their crushes out using these apps. So, yes, asking her out on text is okay.
How do you ask your crush out over text without sounding needy?
If you want to know how to ask a girl out over text without sounding needy, the trick is knowing when to pull back. Give her a chance to reply first. Controlling yourself from sending tonnes of messages and playing it cool instead is the key to avoid sounding too needy.
What is a cute way to ask a girl out?
There are a ton of answers to this one, but one of the more popular choices is by sending your potential girlfriend a small cake (or any sweets she likes) or a teddy bear with a message. This message can be written in frosting or hidden inside.
How do you ask your crush out without getting rejected?
When asking your crush out, you have to be confident that you won't get rejected. Show it in your body language, the phrase you say out loud. But don't let go of the chance of rejection, even though it's small. This can help you move on when she decides otherwise.
What to say if you want to ask a girl out?
If you don't know what to text a girl to ask her out, I suggest that you go through your past conversations (if there are some) and check if she told you about any interest. For example, if your crush has been talking about a movie she'd love to watch, use this as your anchor when asking her out. Simply text her, "Hey, I've read about (movie), and I think it's interesting. Want to watch it with me?" Smooth like butter.
More Tips on How To Get The Girl
If you found these tips for how to ask a girl out on a date useful, check out some of our other resources and dating expert put together to help you get this beautiful girl. Money is never a big deal.
- Turn your luck with the ladies around and figure out the perfect way of how to get a girl to like you.
- Don't let nerves paralyze you. Learn how to approach a girl the good way and stop worrying about finding the right thing to say.
- Get first date ideas for any budget (ice cream, happy hour, or coffee date) that this special girl will never forget. It's a good sign if she asks for a second date.
The key to learning how to ask a girl out isn't memorizing some lines or flashing around cash.
The best way to ask a girl out is to use a comprehensive approach that helps you choose the right girl and makes it easy for her to say yes. As you're learning how to get a date focus on your approach to the whole situation, not on a one size fits all trick.
Asking a girl out is one of the most important steps in learning how to get a girlfriend. After all, if you never ask her out anything will ever happen with her.
Once you learn how to ask out a girl using the right approach you can stop letting nervousness hold you back.
There are no guaranteed ways to ask a girl out. But with this approach, you can make it more likely that she'll yes. Be selective about the girls you ask, give her a reason to say yes, and ask her to do something specific.
Don't wait for good things to come along. Get out there and make things happen. Learn how to ask a girl out the right way and take control of your love life.