How To Get A Girlfriend – 20 Simple steps to finally get the girl!
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If there’s one question that has perplexed men throughout history, it’s how to get a girlfriend.
That question, though, can really mean different things to different men.
For some who already have a girl in mind, they want to know how to get the girl. For others, they want to know how to find a girlfriend prospect in the first place. Others still just want to know how to get a girl, any girl, and worry about details later.
To get the girl, whoever she is, can seem impossible to a lot of guys, but it really isn’t as hard as it can seem. If you use the steps and advice below, you’ll be able to stop worrying about how to get a girlfriend forever.
Look, plenty of guys figure out how to get a girlfriend on their own, and you can feel free to work it out on your own, but there’s plenty of reason to get the tips upfront.
First of all, if you know the path to getting a girlfriend, you can stop stressing about what to do next with a girl you like. A lot of potential relationships are ruined by guys stressing out and making the wrong decision.
With these tips, you can relax a bit and let the process move along smoothly.
Another reason to get an answer upfront to how to get the girl is that you have a greater guarantee of success. If there’s a girl you really like, and you really don’t want to screw up your chance, then you should work off these tips to make sure it all goes right.
Finally, there are some guys who just don’t have a good feel for how to approach girls and how to move forward. They just don’t know how to get the practice to get better at getting a girlfriend, and they’re tired of waiting.
For those guys, having tips to get the girl now can be a real life saver.
Whatever reason is your reason, knowing more now is always better. It saves you stress, potential heartbreak, and wasted time, while increasing the chance you’ll soon be with the girl of your dreams.
Sit down, strap in, and hold on: this list is long, and it is comprehensive.
That means, if you’ll sit through this whole list, you’ll know everything you need to know about how to get a girlfriend. With this list, you can go from the loneliest Day One to complete relationship bliss.
While there are a lot of steps here, none of them are beyond your abilities, and none of them are that hard to accomplish. In fact, we make many of them easier with links to lists of advice and potential clever things to say.
So, just follow along and note down what you have to do, step by step, to get that girl, whether she’s the one you’ve been dreaming of for years or you haven’t even met her yet.
Here’s how to get a girlfriend:
1. Make the decision: You want or need a girlfriend
The first thing you have to do, no matter what else you have in mind, is to commit to this process. 20 steps to do anything suggests a certain level of commitment, and this is no different.
So, sit down, look yourself in the eye in a mirror and say: I need a girlfriend. Own that desire and use it to inspire you to work toward your goal to get the girl.
To really accomplish this, you have to be willing to follow every step and not quit. Don’t get discouraged. You’ll get results. But you have to want this.
2. Decide What the Right Girl Looks Like
You’ll never know the answer to this completely. Relationship chemistry is funny like that. You can’t predict exactly who will be perfect for you and vice versa.
But you can still give yourself a bit of head start by knowing what you want in a girlfriend and what you don’t want.
Setting standards help you avoid making dating and relationship mistakes or looking too desperate.
So, what do you want in an ideal girlfriend? Do you want a girl like you or one who will take you out of your comfort zone?
You don’t have to just look for that kind of girl, but answering “who I want to be my girlfriend?” and “why I want a girlfriend?” are just as important as answering “how to get a girlfriend?”
3. Understand Women
The eternal difficulty that we all know we must plunge into: understanding women.
You’ll never answer this completely, but you have to work on finding a few answers if you want to know how to get a girlfriend.
This isn’t actually that hard. Women, just like men, want to be respected. They want to feel attractive but not let that be the only thing someone notices about them. They want to be listened to and encouraged.
Essentially, think of most of your emotional needs and then try to imagine how you would feel receiving the attention you want to give a girl.
4. Know What Women Want In A Man
Once you have an idea of how you think women think, consider what women want in a man.
This is a natural extension of the last step. If women want to feel attractive but not let it dominate their personality, and they want to be listened to and respected, they obviously want a man who gives them these feelings.
That means knowing how to compliment women just enough and figuring out how to ask the right kind of questions to stay engaged.
Add a little charm and some humor, and you’ll be doing pretty well for this step.
We’ll cover all of these points in more detail in the steps below.
5. How To Meet Women
Now you’ve done your prep, it’s time to figure out how to meet women to see if you’ve really learned something.
This is actually a fairly easy step, since you probably know where to meet women because you know where women are (everywhere).
You can easily meet women in class or at work, out at a bar, at a club, at a party through mutual friends, and many other venues.
What you need to decide is the place you feel most comfortable meeting a woman and the way that will make you look your best.
6. How to Approach A Girl
This can be tricky for guys who struggle with approach anxiety, but it’s an important part of how to get a girlfriend, so you have to work on it.
Thankfully, figuring out how to approach a girl can be made a lot easier.
Start by scoping out the scene. What is she doing? Is she with friends? Does she look entertained or bored?
Then, pick your moment when she’s on her own or she isn’t in the middle of a conversation, and choose whether to approach alone or with a friend if you are too nervous to go on your own.
Finally, approach, and be as calm as possible. Try to communicate confidence. That’ll go a long way to brushing over any awkwardness.
7. How to Talk to Girls
Now we get to a major step in how to get a girlfriend: talking to girls. This is really a huge roadblock for some guys, and the cause of a lot of their nervousness.
However, if you want to know how to talk to girls, all you need to do is find something to say.
Sounds easy, right? It is. Just use these tips to always have a great line to throw out and get a conversation going or how to keep a conversation going.
Tip 1. Start A Conversation With A Girl
Stop struggling with how to start a conversation with a girl and just work from conversation starters. These allow you to throw out a comment or question that really gets a conversation going in the direction you want it to go.
These can be incredibly flexible for your personality and the situation. Go off-the-wall with questions about what someone would do for a living if it were the 1600s, or go deep about what should be free in life but isn’t.
Or, you can go anywhere in-between. It’s all up to you, just have a few options prepared.
Tip 2. Know What To Say To A Girl
Once you’re in the conversation, you have to know what to say to a girl to keep that conversation going.
Well, good news for you: you’re already prepared. You already have things to talk about with a girl.
You’ve scoped out the scene and can use your surroundings. You know a bit about women and can work off her reactions. And, you’ve got conversation starters to move the conversation in a new direction.
Just listen, respond, make observations, and be prepared to change the subject if the conversation is running dry.
Tip 3. Make Her Laugh
Feel like things aren’t clicking yet? Get her giggling and she’ll be eager to keep the conversation going.
Like conversation starters these can be extremely adaptable. You can put the pressure on her to be funny by asking her to tell her most embarrassing store, or you can get her laughing up front by asking her if she’d rather live out her life only eating bananas or always smelling like bananas.
Tip 4. Give Her A Compliment
Balance out the funny with some compliments for girls to let her know you’re interested.
Don’t sweat about how to compliment a girl, it’s easy. The trick is to make sure the compliment really speaks to her and is not too obvious.
Tell her she has great taste if she’s describing the kind of music or movies she likes. Or, tell her she’s funny and so easy to talk to, so she knows you’re having a good time.
You can always throw in that she’s beautiful later, but lead with something a little more personality-focused.
Tip 5. Know When to Move On
Whether it’s the end of a conversation or a conversation that just won’t take off, you have to know when to walk away.
If you’re having a great conversation, don’t cling too late. Give an excuse (after using Step 8 below) and get out of there before she’s sick of you.
If you just aren’t clicking, do the exact same, minus Step 8. There’s no shame i just not quite hitting it off. Just go try with another girl.
8. How To Get A Girl’s Number
If things have gone well in your conversation and you are feeling like she wants to keep talking, then it’s time to take some action: get her number.
There are plenty of strategies of how to get a girl’s number—from making a joke out of it to trying to get her to hand it out first—but the best approach is to just be direct.
Just ask. If the conversation has been a good one, she’ll be happy to give it. If not, shrug it off and move on.
9. How To Text A Girl
You’ve already worked through one kind of conversation with a girl, now, to really solve how to get a girlfriend, you have to figure out another one. You have to master how to text a girl.
The great thing about texting is that you already have most of the tools to make this work from your experience in Step 7. You just have to adapt them and add a little bit to become a text master.
Tip 6. Start a Text Conversation With a Girl
You can start direct and just tell her you were thinking of your conversation and wanted to chat. Or, go goofy by asking which topping absolutely never belongs on a pizza. You can also go more genuine and just open with a question about what she wants to be doing in five or ten years.
Choose the best option based off your previous conversation, and build from there.
Tip 7. Make Your Texts Work for You
The beauty of text is that you don’t have to rely just on your own wit and clever lines. You can let technology make you amusing.
Send her funny .gifs or share YouTube clips to try to introduce her to your favorite show. Work with silly emojis and memes to get an easy chuckle.
Let the text tools do some of the hard work for you.
Tip 8. Ask Questions
You’re already asking some questions with conversation starters, but if you really want to know the key to how to get a girlfriend, it’s asking great questions. And text conversations are no different.
Ask her about her day. Ask her opinion about politics, school, work, TV, music. Ask her to tell you something personal that she doesn’t share with anyone else.
To get into a relationship and maintain one, you need great communication, and you can only get that by asking questions and listening to what she has to say.
Tip 9. Know What To Text A Girl
At this point, you’ve got conversation starters, .gifs, and questions. What else can you possibly need. When you’re wondering what to text a girl next, there are plenty of options.
Send her a compliment, just like the kind covered in Step 7. Then, say something sweet, like how you really enjoy texting her.
Finally, when the conversation is winding down, tell her you hope you can text again soon. Don’t leave the conversation until you’ve at least implied you want to do this again, and soon.
10. How To Tell If a Girl Likes You
You are, at this point, at least two conversations in with this girl, so you probably want to know how to tell if a girl likes you or not.
There are definitely signs a girl likes you. First, if she’s taking the initiative. If she’s texting you, or asking to meet up, you know she’s probably interested.
She may also show it by laughing extra hard at your bad jokes or showing a bit of extra nervousness around you.
Watch her body language when you see her as well. Does she lean in towards you? Does she look in your eyes? These are good signs.
Most importantly, if she continues to want to talk without showing any signs of chummy, friendly affection, she probably likes you.
11. How To Get Out Of The Friend Zone
But what if she doesn’t like you? What if you’re stuck in the friend zone?
Well, there are definitely ways how to get out of the friend zone, but you have to decide if you really want to pursue them. Essentially, forcing your way out can ruin a friendship, so decide if you really aren’t happy with that friendship before moving forward.
If you are willing to sacrifice the friendship to gamble on getting closer, then the best way out of the friend zone is being direct.
Tell the girl you like her. Give her romantic compliments. Tell her you want to get closer.
At that point, she may respond in kind, or she may reject the idea. You have no control over that, but at least you’ll have certainty.
12. How to Get A Girl To Like You
Not every guy who is interested in a girl who isn’t interested in him is stuck in the friend zone. Many just need to get closer to the girl they’re interested in.
In other words, you need to figure out how to get a girl to like you if she doesn’t like you already.
This is really a multi-front strategy, and it’s best to pursue all of them at once.
Start by dressing better and taking more care of your looks.
Then, change how you talk to the girl. Flirt more, throw in more compliments that are both about her mental and physical appeal.
You can also use little physical touches to establish some real contact and add some eye contact to provide more intimacy.
Bring all of these together, and she’ll definitely know you’re interested, all while being more likely to develop an interest herself.
13. How to flirt with a girl
In Step 12, I suggested you do a little flirting to get her interested. This makes the next question obvious: how to flirt with a girl?
The best way to think about flirting is as a combination of the skills you’re already working on. It’s amusing, suggestive, and also complimentary.
Use those touches and eye contact to better show your meaning, then really lay into the compliments. Tell her you really love her name or no one can make that boring class you share interesting but her.
You can also flip these around to be more amusing. Tell her you know she only bothers with that class because you’re there. Or that she really must love talking to you if she keeps texting.
Keep it fun and light, and you’ll find your way.
14. How To impress a girl
If you aren’t good at flirting, or it isn’t getting you as far as you as you want, try a new tactic: impress her.
So, then you just have to discover how to impress a girl, right?
For this, begin by just showing her you’re making an effort. Dress better, be more polite and thoughtful, and show a more confident side.
Then, try to impress her based on her individual tastes. If she loves a certain kind of coffee, for instance, bring her a cup next time you meet up.
Show her you listen and you act on what you hear, and she’s sure to be impressed.
15. How To Ask A Girl Out
You’ve gone to a lot of trouble, but she finally likes you. Now, your just have to find out how to ask a girl out.
There’s two equally good tactics here: you can either have some cute ways to ask a girl out, or you can be direct.
You can buy her something cute (a teddy bear, chocolate, that cup of coffee mentioned above) and attach a note. Or, you can come up with some fun clues she has to solve to find out you’re asking.
Or, just look her in the eyes and ask. If you’re brave enough for it, this is probably the best method, although flowers never hurt.
16. How to Make That First Date Stand Out
This step really depends on the girl. The best way to make a date stand out is to tailor it to the girl’s interests.
Take her to the best ball game you can if she’s a sports fan. Or, walk along the beach and chat if she’s the classic romantic. You could also bike in the mountains if she’s more sporty.
Just make it about her tastes and leave plenty of room for just the two of you to chat and get closer.
17. How to kiss a girl
You’ve gotten to the big date, it’s all set up, and now you realize, you don’t know how to kiss a girl.
There are a ton of kissing tips out there, but you really only need to keep a few things in mind.
Start by not being too aggressive. Don’t go all in with tongue and wide open mouth. Being a little conservative is okay.
Then, follow her lead a bit. Try to feel the way she wants to be kissed.
And finally, don’t linger too long on it. Let the moment last and move on.
And remember, no one loses a relationship because of one bad kiss. Know you’ve got plenty more practice coming if you’re doing everything else right.
18. How To Ask A Girl To Be Your Girlfriend
If you’re doing everything right, you’re probably ready to find out how to ask a girl to be your girlfriend.
Here, you are really working from the same playbook as Step 15, but in this case you really want to be both cute and direct.
So, take her out on your best date. Buy her a very personal gift. And then, ask her straightforwardly, as confidently as you can.
Love. It’s one of life’s little mysteries. Actually, it’s not that small. It’s this big thing that takes over your life and makes it so much better. But before you get to the love stage, you need to find a girlfriend. Whether you have a girl in mind or you just want a girlfriend, knowing the best way to get a girlfriend is always an advantage.
From knowing how to approach a girl to finally getting to know her, our guides will help guide you through the maze that is relationships.
So with that in mind, here are some of the best ways to get a girlfriend:
Step 1. how to make a girl fall in love with you
They say it takes two to tango. But knowing how to make a girl fall in love with you can really help turn like into love. Your actions make a big difference and could be the difference between forever love and a quick breakup.
Firstly, take a breath and relax. Remember, dating is supposed to be fun. The second you start taking things too seriously, your relationship is sure to take a quick nosedive. Staying calm and relaxed is a great way to approach a relationship and life in general.
Once you have calmed your nerves, now you need to do one of the most important things. Listen. By listening to her, you show her that you are interested and that you are dependable. And who doesn’t love that?
Pro Tip. Make Her Want You
Want to know how to make her want you? Here is a pro tip:
Be confident and sincere. By being sincere, you help people to trust you and let’s face it, the best relationships are built on trust.
Pro Tip. Make someone miss you
We all miss the people that make us laugh and people that we love being around. So by being nice, engaging and caring makes knowing how to make someone miss you is super easy!
19. How To Tell A Girl You Love Her
When things are going well, Step 18 is usually fairly easy, since you probably know the answer already. Much harder is saying I love you.
Straining over how to tell a girl you love her can keep a guy up at night for months. So, put yourself out of your misery.
This really has to be an individual step, designed just for her, but in general, find a way to tell her why you love her before you say the words.
Show her through gifts, experiences, and words all the reasons, then say the words in a special place where it is just the two of you.
20. How to See Where Things Are Going Next
At this point, now that you never have to worry about how to get a girlfriend again, you should take a moment to take stock.
Where do you see this relationship going? Is it a relationship for now or is this heading towards something more permanent?
You don’t need to have these answers now, but addressing them honestly to yourself prepares you for the future, so you can always make the best decision for yourself.
More Steps and Tricks on How To Get The Girl
Getting a girlfriend can be a straightforward process, but there are a lot of tips you need to do it right. Use these articles to further build up your game:
- Use first date tips for men to make that first real impression stellar.
- Figure out thinks women find attractive and get more girlfriend options.
- Keep your girlfriend happy by sending love messages to her.
It can seem a lot to take in at once, but once you take a bit of time to follow all of the above steps, you’ll have solved every question you have about how to get a girlfriend.
It’s almost hard to believe, but the truth is that the trick when you want to get the girl is really just knowing how to follow a simple set of rules, all of which appear above in detail (and with links to even more detailed explanations).
There’s no more to it than that. You can know all about how to find a girlfriend in the course of just reading a single article.
Once you master the above 20 steps, you don’t have to stress about how to get the girl of your dreams or how to get a girl, any girl, at all. You’ll know how to go from alone in your room on Friday night to have someone to spend every night with in no time at all.
If you’ve already read everything, then congratulations. Now get out there and use your knew skills to get the girlfriend you’ve been waiting for.