Gentlemen, let's have some real talk about the signs a girl doesn't like you.
Reading the signs of rejection is just as vital as knowing how to tell if a girl likes you!
The journey toward how to get a girlfriend is peppered with acceptances and rejections in equal parts. It's important to get both sides of the coin straight in your head.
Today, we’re showing you 10 tell-tale signs that a girl may unfortunately NOT like you and 3 signs specific to texting.
We're also going to give you some coaching on how to mentally and emotionally finesse your way through life's unavoidable rejections. Scroll down to What To Do When You Get Signs a Girl Doesn't Like You for tips on good mental and emotional hygiene to keep your confidence up.
And because we want you to be her man and more than just her friend, we’re also letting you know the 1 powerfully simple way to avoid landing in the dreaded friend zone.
I recommend reading through all of these 10 steps to find your absolute favorites... but if you’re looking for something specific, you can click the links below to jump to that section:
Why Is It Important To Know The Signs She Doesn't Like You?
Guys, a life well lived is a fine balance between putting your heart into the things you care about the most and knowing when to stop wasting time beating your head against a wall.
To get what you want out of life, you've got to know which battles are worth it and which are not worth anybody's time to fight because there's nothing to fight for!
Just as important is your ability to respect a woman's boundaries. If a girl is telling a guy in every way she can that she is not interested and the dude persists doggedly, it starts to look really socially inept, and creepy at worst.
We live in the era of #metoo, where the fear between the genders is at an all-time high. These days, everyone is sensitive about how men and women relate to each other, and with that sensitivity often comes heightened reactions to misunderstandings that can have significant consequences.
A real man knows how to respond to rejection with maturity and compassion for both himself and the woman who gave signs a girl doesn't like you. Turning what is an ego-wound to an average man into the powerful personal awareness is what sets you apart as an extraordinary man.
Finally, it's important to know the signs a girl doesn't like you so that you can walk in the world with your head held high, confident in your ability to communicate on all the levels of subtlety. Mastering the ability to read body language, tone, and energy deepen our understanding of ourselves as men.
How To See The Signs She Doesn't Like You: 10 Steps
Recognizing the signs a girl doesn't like you early will leave you with your pride intact and more time and energy to pursue women that more closely match your own vibration.
1. She’s Not Breaking the “Touch Barrier”
One of the main things a guy should look for to see if a girl is comfortable with him, is to see if she is breaking the “touch barrier.” Because one of the ways a girl shows she likes you and likes being close to you, is to invitingly touch you on places like your knee, your shoulder, or your arm.
So if a girl you’re talking to is holding back from any and all physical contact, that might be a big hint that she doesn’t see you as more than a friend.
Don't mistake lack of interest for shyness. Most of the time, you can detect a sense of tension and timidity in a shy girl whereas there simply won't be that sense of holding back with a girl who simply doesn't like you.
A girl who simply doesn't like you doesn't try to impress you and isn't nervous about how she presents herself. Contrarily, you can tell when a shy girl is thinking about touching you but refraining from it by the way she averts her eyes or pretends to be busy doing something else.
2. Her Body Language Is Telling You She’s On Guard
A woman’s body language can say a lot. It can tell you that she wants you to be closer, or it can tell you that she wishes you would just go away. And because a woman may not always come out and say ‘I’m sorry, I’m just not into you’, looking at what her body language is saying can be an incredibly powerful trick.
So, what are some of the body-language signs that a girl would rather be somewhere else?
Look for the classics: Folded arms, hiding her hands, or pointing her feet towards anywhere else than towards you. She might even pull away from you or give you a wide berth when you get physically near her.
3. You Make All The Effort To Come To Her...
While it could be that she’s always busy, or it’s just easier for you to get to her, if it seems like you’re the one doing all the work to meet up with a girl, it’s another sign you’re not her priority and often means she doesn’t really care about your time.
Because think about it: if she were as eager to see you as you were to see her, she’d probably do whatever it takes to hang out with you.
4. She Flakes On Plans At The Last Minute
While it’s obvious that things can change unexpectedly, one of the worst ways it might become clear that a girl isn’t feeling you is if she bails on you and your plans at the last minute. That being said: If she cancels but wants to reschedule for later, don’t assume she doesn’t like you just yet.
5. She’s Not Offering Anything To The Conversation
Of course, some conversations can be awkward or some girls shyer than others, but just like you might try to keep a conversation going with a girl you like, a girl who likes you will try to do the same.
Which means that if she’s not making any effort to really keep the conversation moving, it could be because she doesn’t really care if the conversation goes anywhere.
A girl who wants to get to know you will be asking you questions to satisfy her curiosity. A girl who isn't simply won't show much interest in getting to know you if she's not into you.
6. She Checks Her Phone Every Chance She Gets
While a certain amount of attention to her phone can be normal, eagerly checking every notification that pops up is a classic sign that your conversation isn’t really doing it for her. And that’s because if a girl is really having fun talking or flirting with you, she’ll be more distracted by the vibes you’re putting out... than by the vibrations coming from her phone.
7. She’s Looking Everywhere… Except At Your Eyes
While some girls may playfully avoid eye contact, if a girl knows you’re there, but doesn’t seem to want to look at you, that’s a strong sign not only that she’s not interested, but that you may even be creeping her out a bit.
Averting her eyes is a big one. Eye contact is uncomfortable and undesirable for a girl who's not into you but is aware that you're trying to reach her through them.
And if that happens? The best thing to do is just move on like it’s no big deal.
8. It Seems Like She’s Faking Her Smile
Want to know if a girl is really happy to see you when she smiles?
All you’ve got to do is look for crows feet, the small wrinkles at the corner of her eyes. Because if you can’t see them, there’s a good chance she’s only smiling out of politeness, and not because she’s genuinely excited to see you.
A turned up mouth without the smile lighting up the eyes is definitely a sign that she's just being polite and you should try your luck elsewhere.
9. She Just Sounds Bored
If you’re talking to a girl and her responses seem less than enthusiastic, that might be the first sign that you’re losing your chance to be something more with her. See, when a girl is really into you, you can hear it in her voice in two main ways:
1) She’ll give you a lot more than quick, short answers, and
2) Her excitement may also cause her to subconsciously speak both louder and faster.
10. She Tells You She’s Has A Boyfriend
No, this doesn’t mean she's just playing hard-to-get...
What it means is 1) she has boyfriend, or 2) she’s just not interested.
So whether it’s true or not, if a girl has to tell you she’s got a boyfriend, that should be a pretty clear line in the sand that tells you that you don’t have a chance.
How To Tell If A Girl Doesn't Like You Over Text
Just like there are lots of ways for how to tell if a girl likes you over text, there are just as many red flags to look for when it comes to timing, content, and tone of her text that are clearly saying she's just not into you.
11. She Takes More Than 24 hours To Text You Back
If you’re waiting a whole 24 hours to hear back from a girl you texted, chances are that responding to you is, unfortunately, not her priority. Now, it’s true that this might not necessarily mean she flat out dislikes you...
But if she’s really thinking about you, she’ll at least make an effort to let you know she’s busy, and not just blow you off. This could be as simple as prompts like, "ttyl," "brb," or "more later."
12. You're Doing All The Work To Keep Texting Stream Going
Sometimes, we all just answer out of politeness and because we have been taught that when someone talks to us, we're supposed to reply.
However, the intent can be read in the tone and content of the text. If her answers are things like, "k" and "ic," "yeah," and other consistently one word answers, she's freezing you out. She's telling you quite clearly that she's not interested in texting more and hopes for the conversation to die out.
13. She Ghosts
There's no clearer message than no response at all. If you take the initiative to contact her three times with no answer, she hasn't forgotten. She hasn't lost her phone somewhere. Even three times is pushing it. You can catch the vibe of rejection in two unanswered texts. The third is the final confirmation. She's just not interested.
What To Do When You Get Signs A Girl Doesn't Like You
Reading the signs that a girl doesn't like you is easy. It's managing your emotions and knowing how to move forward with your self-esteem intact that are the challenging parts.
Every interaction we have with another human being is a two-way street: It's not her fault just as much as it's not your fault either. Simultaneously, both of you are equally responsible for what went down.
Does that seem like a giant contradiction? On the simplest, most black-and-white level of thinking, it is. Now, can you accept that two contradictory statements are equally true at the exact same time?
Welcome to the truth. You've got to hold what comes from your ego and what comes from your higher consciousness in your mind simultaneously to find the empowerment and unwavering self-esteem that you long for.
We as a society have not been taught good mental and emotional hygiene. We get told again and again to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and soldier onward like it's nothing when it is.
Let's agree that suppressing emotions is debilitating and unhealthy. That's some expired, old world masculine garbage. So how can we process our emotions constructively to come through stronger and more confident?
Everyone brings their baggage: She may not like you and give you the signs a girl doesn't like you because you remind her of someone she had a bad experience with, like her father or an ex-boyfriend.
She may not like you because you remind her of herself. You might have something that she doesn't like about herself that she hasn't made peace with because of trauma.
You've got to remember that trauma runs far deeper than a lot of people realize. Ancestral trauma affects everything we are. Don't believe it? Consider how many people are terrified of spiders without ever having had a bad experience with them. The point is, often a girl not liking you has everything to do with her and nothing to do with you.
Except for when it has everything to do with you and nothing to do with her. There is an infinite amount of subconscious energy that passes between two people. We attract certain people to learn more about ourselves by observing how we respond to them.
If you find yourself calling her the b-word, out loud or in your mind, look carefully at your own insecurities that are causing this reaction. Does your scarcity mindset cause you to focus on bitterness instead of allowance? Take responsibility for what emotions are yours. Don't be the one who is eager to blame her because it keeps you comfortably away from examining yourself.
Don't be afraid to look at yourself. Realize that just because a girl was looking for something other than what you offer, you are not less worthy.
If you're getting the signs a girl doesn't like you, she could be responding to some negative energy you carry that you're unaware of. For example, if your voice starts to be the negative voice inside her head, she's not going to want to keep you around.
As men, we have had very limited emotional freedom throughout history. There were wars to fight and survival concerns. Being strong for these meant sacrificing the softer parts of ourselves until they got buried deep in our subconscious.
As men, we haven't been able to admit them openly. Least of all to ourselves, but all that's changing. The more of our subconscious trauma we become aware of and release, the brighter our energetic footprint is, the more positive our vibe, the more women are drawn to us. But most importantly, the less we pain we feel when we get the signs a girl doesn't like you. That's how it goes. You've got to do the work though: recognizing and owning your emotions. It's a lifelong journey for sure.
The Biggest Thing You Can Do To Stay Clear of the Friendzone
The friend zone is a state of unrequited attraction and desire, often unrecognized by the girl in question. It is a zone of tension and swallowed feelings. How to get out of the friend zone is one of the most important things you need to get a girlfriend you love, respect and admire.
A dead-end for getting the girl, and into an equally bad state of mind, if there’s one place a guy wants to avoid when flirting with a girl... it’s the dreaded “friend zone.”
Luckily, there’s an incredibly easy way to avoid ending up there:
1) don’t wait too long to make your move, and
2) make your intentions with her as painfully clear as possible.
Want a couple easy ways to do both? If a few sincere compliments in the first conversation don’t make it obvious, all you’ve got to do is ask her if she wants to go out sometime.
More Tips on How To Tell If A Girl Likes You
Reading subtle energetic signals is a huge part of courtship.
- Shy girls communicate a little differently than outgoing girls: You'll need to know the signs a shy girl likes you.
- All girls have a communication style that can sometimes go over guys heads: You'll want to know how to read what are actually very clear signs a girl likes you.
- A healthy amount of push and pull is natural: It allows each partner to gauge how the other responds to see if a match is viable. You'll need to consider the signs she wants you to chase her.
- Your crush might be sending you signals that you don't want to miss: Think about how to know if your crush likes you.
- What if you're a shy guy: Here are some things to know when you ask yourself, "Do girls like shy guys?"
Knowing the signs a girl doesn't like you will keep everyone's time from being wasted, promote respect for boundaries, and sharpen your communication skills.
Processing the signs a girl doesn't like you from a higher perspective will give you the tools you need to grow as a man. Accepting the signs a girl doesn't like you with positivity will allow you to focus on being so energetically excellent that your great vibes can't be ignored and when they are, it's a tiny drop in the bucket.
Those are the 10 signs a girl doesn’t like you, 3 tips on reading girls by text and the #1 way to stay out of the friend zone.