Guys, things to talk about with your girlfriend are necessary to deepen your bond and help you become self-aware.
What to talk about with your girlfriend goes far beyond small talk. Far beyond the mental mind. Far beyond what she did that day (although that also matters).
We're here with some pointers on how to keep a conversation going.
Nobody likes awkward silence. When it happens, it shows your ability to articulate your emotions and self-awareness may be blocked.
Let's get clear on things to talk about. Luckily, knowing how to talk to girls is not rocket science. You'll soon realize that connecting deeply, human being to human being, comes as naturally as breathing.
15 Best Things to Talk About with Your Girlfriend
Being mentally, emotionally, and soulfully articulate with the one you love most is one of life's greatest rewards. This is what makes you a high-quality man and an exceptional human being.
1. Talk about her interest
We're more than just our jobs and the weather. What makes her heart and soul sing?
2. Her family
Families can be complicated, full of great love and/or deep trauma and wounds. Understanding the complex relationship dynamics here will help both of you understand why the other reacts a certain way when times get tough. Understanding family wounds will help you have more compassion for each other.
Our friendship dynamics also reflect different facets of who we are. Observe what she says about her friends to better understand her expectations and limitations within all relationships.
4. Beauty treatments
Does she pursue beauty treatments out of self- love, or fear of not being enough? Allow your curiosity to take hold. You might consider getting some spa treatments together. We all want to look our best out of love for self.
5. Discuss things you have in common
You'd be surprised how many things you have in common. It doesn't have to be a hobby. It can be a way of relating to something, or a perspective or belief about the universe.
6. Make sure you tell her what you love about her
When you can articulate exactly what you love about her, you stand above one who calls love simple to mask his lack of understanding of it.
7. Ask your girl what she feels more grateful for
Finding gratitude in the least likely, uncomfortable, painful places is the mark of a strong, resilient person.
8. Discuss an embarrassing moment in life
Allowing for vulnerability reveals your humanity and draws you both closer. She'll love you more for your imperfections.
9. Discuss a favorite childhood memory
What we loved and were frightened of in childhood is a huge part of who we are today.
10. Discuss your future together
Manifest your life together down to the most minute details.
11. Discuss your favorite television shows or movies
Our taste in media says everything about how our mind works and where our empathy lies.
12. Ask your girlfriend when she feels the happiest
What a gift to be able to share another's happiness at any time.
13. Interesting things during the day
Talking extensively about the minutiae of our day evokes a greater appreciation for things we might have otherwise missed. You can get her perspective and find you suddenly see it in a whole new way.
14. Her inner feelings
We all long to have someone to share our innermost feelings with.
15. Tell me how your day is going
This vague, open-ended question can be answered in infinite ways. It is an invitation to freedom of speech.
15 Random Things to Talk About With Your Girlfriend
The most rewarding moments in life are often completely random and unplanned. Your level of openness to them is often a barometer for how you're feeling about your own life.
Random things to talk about with your girlfriend are sure to deepen your bond in more ways than one. You'll both be exercising your creativity.
16. Fun things you recently did together
You can ask this question a million times and get infinite different answers.
17. Your childhood and your past.
Remembering our childhoods is so important for us to better understand ourselves as adults. The moments we were scared or felt validated as young children completely shape our reactions to challenges as adults.
18. Naughty conversations.
Our fantasies are also powerful keys to freedom and healing old wounds. Receiving validation and reciprocation here is so healthy for a relationship.
19. Talk about your fears.
Often, two people are in each other's lives to help each other move past their fears. So you must talk about them to invite such growth in.
20. Tell her why you started dating her
There is nothing more curious than that initial spark and how it unfolded.
21. Tell her where you plan to be in five years and what that means to you
Your aspirations are pieces of your soul. You'll both also gain a better understanding of your long term compatibility.
22. Talk about your proudest moments and ask her about hers
Was it a source of external or internal validation, or both? You'll learn what parts of yourself you value the most.
23. Most happy moments
This inquiry is infinite. It can serve as an eternal reset button that brings the focus back to joy and thanks for all we receive.
24. Discuss your first date and what about it stood out to you
The blossoming of chemistry and love is one of life's greatest joys and mysteries. Comb through the details over and over again where you are both the stars of the show.
25. Ask about the worst thing that happened to her today
This is a great way to practice empathy. You do NOT have to create an unsolicited solution for her. Refraining from trying to make her problem go away with "You should..." statements might be the greatest act of true masculinity you can muster! Not all problems are meant to be minimized with a band aid solution. Just be present for her and listen deeply until she asks for your help or advice.
26. Start conversations about serious life topics
No more dancing around serious life topics like a weenie. If she's ready, bite the bullet and dive in. You need to be on the same page about stuff like beliefs about raising children, abortion, political and social affiliations, and handling finances.
27. Ask what she wanted to be when she was 7
Seven is old enough to have vivid memories and young enough that peer pressure hadn't already set in. We develop some of the most untainted parts of our identity at age 7.
28. Ask your girlfriend what her 3 favorite things to talk about are
There are things we all love to talk about and those will be your greatest portals to deeper connection.
29. Talk about your spiritual beliefs and values
Our spiritual beliefs are some of the most intimate parts of us and for many of us. It's important to establish where we align. Many of us believe that we agreed to be with certain people before this physical lifetime began. See what she believes beyond this incarnation.
30. Ask your girlfriend who she doesn't want to be like in the future
You'll know her triggers and traumas based on her strongest negative reactions. You'll become clearer on her positive values.
15 Interesting Things to Talk About With Your Girlfriend
While "interesting" itself is a horribly bland descriptor, truly interesting conversation topics, events, animals, and people create endless ways for two people to better know each other. A desirable man always has a litany of interesting things to talk about up his sleeves.
31. What you said you’d do… but haven’t done already
Almost all of us procrastinate something in our lives that trigger some of our oldest fears and insecurities. Talking through them may be just what you need to ignite the needed fire.
32. Ask Her Who She Looks Up To
Those who inspire us around us say everything about our own dreams and potential.
33. Ask Her What Her Definition Of Romance Is
For all the clichés out there, you'll be shocked to know the secondary definitions of romance.
34. Plans for the coming weekend
We tend to go big on the weekends. What's she like outside the daily grind? Does she have a side hustle?
35. Share your secrets
For every one offered, you've got to reach deeply inside yourself. Everybody has secrets. You need to be aware of yours. To pretend otherwise is to resist awareness.
36. Talk about your workplace
Work life can be different for each person. We all vary on how our work life reflects our truth. No matter what, work does reflect us, if even to let us know how we're not going after our actual dreams.
37. Your biggest fear
Articulating the extent of it is part of facing it. It's a lifelong journey.
38. Self-improvement goals
This is a look at self-esteem and belief in self.
39. Share some school and college jokes
40. Personal opinion
Can you both see all sides of any spectrum? How comfortable are you with your own freedom to choose?
41. Ask her views on life
Articulable social, environmental, political, and cultural views are a mark of intelligence.
42. Relive your first kiss
Put that passion into words and you may fall in love with the vibrational potential of the words themselves.
43. Things you want to do alone
Solitude is so important for "internal housekeeping." It's as important as keeping the dishes washed and the floor swept.
44. Biggest regret
A lot of us like to avoid this one by saying "I have none." The real question is, what did you learn to do differently from all of your failures? How are you adequately valuing the gift of failure?
45. Specific traits you want in a partner
We all of a type, and we love to hear that we are someone else's ideal. We all love to hear how we are not someone's ideal and we blew their mind with something even better.
11 Things To Talk About On A First Date With Your Girlfriend
Having a robust collection of things to talk about on a first date is integral to increase the chances of getting to the second and third dates.
46. Talk about past relationships but avoid too much ex-talk
Being able to frame all of your past relationships in light of the wisdom you gained from them no matter how unpleasant they were says everything about the quality partner you are now. She'll know immediately whether you're prone to bitterness, grudges, blaming. She'll also know immediately whether you're compassionate, forgiving, can take responsibility for yourself, and ready for a new relationship!
47. Ask about their job, don’t ask about their salary
You'll get an idea of her daily life, her motivations, dreams, aspirations, and maybe how capable she is of committing to them.
48. Her Experiences
We all want to know the things that shape each other.
49. Her Hometown
Her roots shape her, no matter how happy she was there.
50. Her Dreams
Do they resonate with yours? Are you capable of following your own while allowing another to follow their own albeit being together?
51. What She Loves to Do
Offer her vivid, passionately articulated examples of what you love to invite her to share hers.
52. Her Motivations
Often our motivations beneath the surface can come as a surprise. They're often very different than what's on the surface.
53. Where She Went to School
School can be a world before the actual adult world.
54. Something You Wouldn’t Guess About Her
We all want to know what we're seeing but not seeing. We're all more than what we appear.
55. Her Pets
A lot of us get all soft, warm, fuzzy and open when we talk about our non-judgmental, unconditionally loving animal companions.
For some of us, our cultural heritage is a huge part of our identity.
Downloadable and Printable List of Things To Talk About With Your Girlfriend
Here is a downloadable and printable jpg/pdf list of things to talk about with your girlfriend (right-click the image and select Save Image As...):
More Great Things To Talk About
There are a lot of awesome things to talk about to keep the conversation going. Check them out!
- Add these conversation starters to your collection.
- Always make sure that you never run out of things to talk about on a first date.
- Keep the connection going with questions to ask your best friend.
We hope you never run out of soul-searching things to talk about with your girlfriend. Two individuals with a strong ability to communicate both directly and indirectly (intuitively) are bound to have the most rewarding, evolving relationships.
The things to talk about with your girlfriend should never come from a place of pride or ego: "Look at me, look how great I am!"
What to talk about with your girlfriend should always be a reflection of what you desire to know about her and what you're eager to share with her.