Today, we’re showing you the top 10 turn offs for women, that you NEED to avoid.
If you’ve done everything right with a girl, there will come a point where it seems like you can do no wrong. Where it seems like no matter what you do, she’s going to like anything that you’re about.
But guys, even when things are going good, especially when they’re going good, there are plenty of seemingly harmless, everyday things you can do that either slowly get under a woman’s skin and make her lose interest, or just kill the chemistry in the blink of an eye.
16 Turn Offs For Women That You Want To Avoid
So… to help you out, we’re showing you the 10 biggest turn offs for women guys do that tend to slip through the cracks.
...And because we want you to know how to take your game to the next level, we’re also showing you the #1 thing you can easily do, to almost completely avoid turning a girl off.
Now let’s jump in.
16. Low Volume Facial Hair
One of the biggest understatements of the year here... facial hair has made a pretty big comeback.
For a while (as in, for a few decades), being clean cut and shaven was more or less the norm. But these days, facial hair is everywhere. As soon as a guy can grow it, BOOM. No going back.
Full beards, five o’clock shadows, mustaches, mutton chops. If it grows on the face, guys are trying it out.
Nobody really knows what led to bearded revolution over the last decade or so, but there is one unfortunate side effect: A lot of guys are going for beards, when it’s just not in the cards for them.
We know, facial hair is cool... and even if you don’t want it most of the time, it’s nice to have the option.
While, of course, your facial hair your choice... when it comes to turning on girls, patchy facial hair typically doesn’t do it for them... and almost always, they’re gonna prefer a clean-shaven face to get close to.
15. Having a Bed That Looks… Well, Gross
Let me ask you a question:
Would you want to get into a girl's bed if you saw that her sheets were worn, holey, and seemingly dirty?
Of course not, and guys... neither does she. She doesn't want the sheets of a sloppy teenager... she wants to see the sheets of a grown man.
...So instead of turning her off with your sheets, make your bed something she's excited to get into by getting the sheets she wants:
Rule #1: Get sheets with an adult style. Adult style means sheets with neutral colors (like these) and/or subtle pattern (like these), and not crazy prints or black (black makes it impossible to see stains… and makes her think you’re hiding them).
Rule #2: Incredible comfort. She wants soft, cool sheets. Under the covers with you can get pretty warm, so get mostly cotton sheets to keep her cool.
Rule #3: Clean freshness. You’ve got adult sheets now, so you better keep them clean and fresh-smelling (her nose is more powerful than yours source so even if you think your sheets smell good, wash them just to be safe).
If your sheets follow these 3 rules, not only will your sheets not turn her off, but you'll also have a bed that she'll look forward to jumping into.
Note from the Editor, Kyle:
What sheets do I recommend?
They're by far the most comfortable sheets (rule #2) I've ever owned (they're made with a special long-staple cotton/percale weave to make them light, breathable, and, above all, ridiculously comfortable). And maybe even better, their sheets have the classically manly/adult style you need (rule #1), without being boring or bland (my new sheets (here's the ones I got) have turned my bed into the best looking part of my bedroom).
And after trying their crazy comfortable sheets, we decided to partner with Brooklinen to get you guys a big (but limited-time) discount with code 'Mantelligence'. I'm not sure how long this deal will last... so upgrade your bedding with this big discount while you still can.
14. Being Cheap… When You Don’t Have to Be
Guys… I want to be very clear here:
‘Being cheap’ is not the same as ‘saving money’. Women completely understand if you can't do fancy dinners/dates more than a couple times a year (and chances are she'll love any good free dates you take her on).
But on the other hand... being 'cheap' is being overly and unnecessarily concerned with money, and letting your date know about it.
Here are some real-life examples of what a ‘cheap’ guy will do:
#1: Order the cheapest thing on the menu, and make a joke if his date orders something more expensive. Even if you’re kidding, this makes her feel hugely unappreciated.
#2: Ask to split the bill, when he's the one who asked her out. Look, 'don't go Dutch' is a core rule of manliness… if you ask her out, you pay. It’s just polite.
#3: Bring a bottle of wine to a party, and take the leftover wine home. I'm not even going to explain this one...
With these, the difference between 'being cheap' and 'saving money' makes sense, right? Here’s the bottom line:
It’s perfectly ok to be frugal, but (until you're a serious couple) don’t mention money problems, complain about how much things cost, or ask your date to pay for things.
13. Wearing a Torn-Up, Ratty Belt
When you go on a date, you wouldn’t wear a t-shirt that was baggy, holey, or stained... or shoes with your toes poking out of the front, would you?
Of course not… so why would you continue to wear a belt that's stretched, scored, marked, or otherwise sloppy?
And I know you're probably thinking, 'how do women even notice this?'
Well, to a lot of guys, the only purpose of their belt is to hold their pants up... but to us, it's one of the two accessories that every guy should be wearing (belt + watch). So... not only do we look for it, but if one of two (or half) of your accessories look bad, you look bad.
And really, think about it:
Can you imagine James Bond walking up to a beautiful woman wearing the belt above? What about our president wearing it as he meets with the world's leaders?
Both are almost painful to imagine, right? Guys... here's the bottom line:
You have two chances to impress us with your accessories... don't throw one away by wearing an old tattered belt.
A Note from the Editor, Kyle:
It seems like all belts inevitably end up like the one above, right? So how can you stop your belts from becoming a worn-down mess?
Modernize your belt with the holeless belt from Anson Belt & Buckle. Instead of a traditional belt's 5 holes (set 1 inch apart)... Anson's holeless belt has 30+ options (spaced 1/4 inch apart). In other words: it has 6x the hole options and has them 4x more frequently than a traditional belt. Here's what it looks like (back and front):
These 'microadjustments' are a small but powerful advancement. With them, your belt is dramatically more comfortable (as your belt uniquely fits your waist), your belt won't become a cracked, disheveled mess (there's no holes to become cracked/disheveled), and your belt will always fit you perfectly (even as your waist grows and shrinks).
Last February I met Frank and David (the father-son team who runs Anson), and the two hooked me up with a few of their holeless belts to try. After having it on for 5 minutes, I asked myself, 'this is so much better... how did I ever wear any other type of belt?'
Guys... if you want a better belt, I highly recommend you give Anson's holeless belt a try (and ps: they have a 100% satisfaction guarantee... so why wouldn't you try it?)
12. Accidentally Making Yourself the Focus of the Date
A lot of guys don’t realize that they’re accidentally being too focused on themselves on a date.
And really... it’s pretty easy to do:
You might be nervous... you may be worried there will be an awkward silence... you may just be distracted by work or a game... but no matter the reason, focusing on yourself is a huge turn-off.
So on any date (your 1st or 100th date)... consciously focus on her. Learn about her life, ask about her day/work/passion, be proud if she accomplished something and/or console her when she’s sad.
To us, that's one of the biggest ways a man can be a gentleman... and it's a huge turn-on.
11. Wearing Un-Stylish Shoes
Un-stylish shoes are the one thing that almost every woman brings up in conversations about their biggest turn-offs.
But… why do they care so much?
Well, the exact reasons vary from girl to girl, but there are generally two main reasons:
- She knows almost any well-fitted shirt/pants will look good on a fit man, but that you actually have to have a sense of style to know what shoes look good (basically, you can’t skate on good looks with shoes).
- Your shoes are one of the final touches you put on your outfit. And if you care enough about the final touches like your shoes and your belt (#5 above), it means you're a man who cares enough to pay attention to detail.
Now... what kind of shoes do women want you to wear on dates?
Honestly, as long as they’re not flip-flops, sandals or gym shoes, they can be any shoes in good condition (as you can probably guess, ratty shoes are just as bad as ratty belts).
10. Being ‘Too Open’ (About Money, About Your Past, About Your Family Troubles)
Guys, read this one carefully, because it's tricky:
There’s a distinct line (a timeline, actually) between being expressive (what girls want) and being too informative (what they don’t want). Being expressive means telling her that you like her, being honest when something’s bothering you, etc.
…but being too informative means talking about things that are way too personal/serious too soon (when she's not ready to hear them... like the first few dates).
Make sense? Here's a general timeline of when to open up about certain topics:
Your family troubles: After she’s met the family. Don't overwhelm her with your family's issues, then make her meet them and have to pretend she doesn't know anything.
Money problems: When you move in together. Until then, it's not her problem. You can tell her ‘I’m broke this week’, but don't put the weight of that problem on her.
Ex-girlfriends: Only once she asks! If she doesn't ask, she probably doesn't want to know.
9. Greasy Hair
Alright alright alright.
You’re probably hearing this and thinking, wait a minute, I KNOW I’ve seen guys with greasy hair get girls, so how are you gonna tell me greasy hair is a turn-off?
Alright, true. But what you might think is hair grease, is actually hair product. And if it’s product, yeah... It’s probably part of their style. But what we’re talking about today, is about the naturally occurring grease that builds up on your hair after not showering.
For some dudes, that grease may show up after a couple days without washing their hair... for others, it might show up after a couple hours. Like sweat and body odor, hair grease is largely genetic, and unfortunately... is something girls will notice when they’re looking at you closely.
8. Ratty Underwear
This one should go without saying.
...But our reports show that a surprisingly high number of guys out there... appear to be pushing their underwear to the limit… and girls are noticing.
For some reason, a lot of guys seem to have the impression that girls won’t catch that pair of ratty old boxers they’ve got on. It’s either because guys think their underwear isn’t all that bad, or because they think girls just don’t care.
Either way, your underwear matters.
You may even know today’s video sponsor, Tani Underwear. Super high-quality and universally girl approved Tani has designed underwear that solves the problems plaguing your underwear drawer and how girls look at your chonies...
Now... instead of showing you a bunch of dudes in underwear (which we’re sure you’d love), how about we show how the right type of underwear, like Tani, keeps girls from ever being turned off by the sight of your boxers.
Reason #1: Breathability
When it comes to your underwear, breathability is everything.
The reason why? Because moisture is not only what causes gross stuff like odor and fungus. But it’s also ultimately what causes boxers to dissolve into the shreds on your floor. And not only that, swamp-ass, as it’s officially called, is the result of underwear that offers no breathability in an area that produces a lot of sweat, and for girls who see it on a guy, it can be pretty hard to ignore.
By using Micro Modal AIR, a futuristic fabric that’s both moisture wicking and quick drying, Tani’s SilkCut Collection manages to keep the moisture levels to a minimum and the infamous swamp-butt at bay.
Reason #2: Accentuation
Do you like when a girl wears sexy, attractive lingerie?
Of course you do, and women want the same. She wants to see something that’s naturally accentuating and attractive. Rather than saggy underwear that looks like you’re wearing a cloth diaper.
High-quality underwear, like Tani, are designed to not only make you and your body look attractive. But they’re also manufactured with special materials, like elastane and Micro Modal Air, so that they last longer, and help hold their shape for longer.
In short guys:
your underwear is probably the last thing a girl sees you wearing, so it definitely needs to make the right impression... and today’s video sponsor, Tani is the exact type of underwear women love.
Tani was even kind enough to hook Mantelligence viewers up with a crazy deal: buy 1 get 1 free! Check it out in the description… and note: it will only work for a limited-time.
7. The Wrong Thing Playing in the Background
In general, one of the major differences between guys and girls, is that context plays a huge role in their attraction, and overall interest in guys.
If this sounds surprising, this phenomenon is pretty well-documented and understood in psychology. While women do like guys who are classically good-looking and well-taken care of, the overall presentation of the guy plays a much bigger role in how girls perceive him.
And that also includes the immediate context of being in the moment with a guy.
One of the places this becomes especially clear, is if you’re hanging out with a girl at your house watching a movie or show. If you’ve got comedy, horror, action or anything too distracting playing in the background, it’s gonna be a lot harder for her to look at you romantically, if anything starts to happen... the reason why is simple:
Because your entire presentation is off.
Which make sense, right? All we’re trying to say, is that if you’re watching a movie on the couch together, always be ready to hit pause.
6. Smelling Like a Gym Bag
You knew this one was coming.
Just about everybody, from AlphaM, to TMF to BasedZeus, has discussed widely the importance of not smelling like an armpit. And the reason for that, is because far and away, a guy who smells bad from a distance, is a HUGE red flag for women.
Now, there are some excuses that girls will let slide: You could have just gotten done working out, you could have been helping a friend move all day, or you could be a sailor returning home from sea.
Basically, if you’ve been engaged in heavy physical activity, you’ll probably get a pass. At least the first few times.
However, if you’re caught repeatedly stinking for no reason, don’t be surprised if she starts asking you to shower before coming over.
5. All Grooming All The Time
Alright. So you guys know that we always advocate proper grooming, taking care of yourself, knowing how to dress and that it’s always a safe bet to look after your appearance.
...But we also know... that with the sheer volume of information, opinion and choices as there is out there, it’s incredibly easy to get carried away in the details and get obsessed with looking good.
While your girl does want you to be able to look good, if you’re taking longer to decide what to wear than she is every day, your impeccable style is probably having the opposite effect of what you want.
4. Disgusting Nails
So, you may not think this is a big deal but a girl almost definitely notices how your nails are looking.
...And even though you probably (hopefully) don’t roll around with finger nails that can take an eye out, they are 100% a detail worth keeping in check. And it’s pretty clear to see why they might be one of the major turn offs for women:
They look crazy, they hide bacteria, and worst of all, they scratch.
Now... you may not have had the misfortune of accidentally scratching a girl with finger or toe nails that are overdue for a trimming... but take our word for it: It’s embarrassing.
And as far as your night goes, there’s basically no coming back from that. While long, unsightly nails are an eyesore for sure, there may be nothing that kills the mood so swiftly as accidentally snagging your girl with a toenail that’s too long.
3. Why So Serious?
Here’s a common scenario:
Imagine you’ve been hanging out with a girl all night and while things may have started off alright, they slowly faded until it seems like she’s just kinda ready to go home. As I’m sure you can imagine.
This is something that happens a lot. And while there are endless reasons why a date can fizzle out, one of the most common reasons, is just because the guy didn’t look like he was having any fun.
Girls are magnetized by fun.
So, if a guy doesn’t seem like he’s enjoying himself, a girl’s most likely not gonna want to hang out for too long. Because like you, like your friends, like anyone else... girls need that feedback to let them know that everything is cool.
So... if you’re hanging out with a girl, and wondering why she doesn’t seem to be enjoying herself, there’s a good chance, that it’s probably because you’re just not smiling enough for her to know.
2. Failing to Mirror Body Language
Just like you’re wired to respond to what she’s throwing your way, she’s gonna respond to what you’re sending hers.
You’ve probably heard us talk about “mirroring” before. Basically, the mirroring we’re talking about is where two people are communicating, while also subtly copying each other’s body language.
Mirroring happens almost entirely on an instinctive level, and it’s a way of subconsciously building familiarity. Animals do it, and so do we. But even though it happens with us barely evening noticing it... it still has a huge effect on chemistry.
So much so, in fact, that if you’re not mirroring a girl’s body language... she’ll have every reason to think you’re not into her, which will lead to her turning off feelings she has for you.
1. Your Teeth
If there’s one thing, one loose end, one last remaining detail that can come back and bite you just as you’ve got a girl comfortable, it’s yellow teeth.
Honestly, this one stings a little bit. Because usually the way a girl finds out a guy has yellow teeth, is if the guy is laughing, smiling and having a good time. It’s a harsh reality.
It’s always in that moment when a dude finally decides to let his guard down and relax, that a girl notices “damn, those teeth are just a little on the yellow side.”
The good news is that, with all the teeth whitening options out there, yellow teeth don’t need to be something you’ve got to worry about.
The bad news is that if you’re just finding this out, you might’ve lost a few points with a few girls already.
The #1 Thing You Can Do to Prevent Turning OFF ALL women
By this point, you might be thinking you’re gonna be walking into a minefield the next time you go hang out with your girl.
...And while it’s remarkably easy to lose favor with a girl you like and take her from feeling it, to turned off, there is one thing you can do everyday to always have a leg up with a girl, get in shape. Seriously.
Now we know, this isn’t as easy for some guys as it is for others, but for a lot of guys out there. A ton of their problems would be solved just by getting strong.
The reason why? Honestly, it’s NOT that you’ll look better. It’s not that you’ll be stronger.
It’s almost 100% due to the fact that exercise is guaranteed the clearest path to becoming a fundamentally more confident version of yourself. Which is without a doubt the #1 realest turn on for women anywhere you go.
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Thanks for watching!