Take your digital flirting skills up a notch with these rules for texting girls I've put together just for you.
If you've ever had a crush on someone, then you probably understand the feeling of first-time jitters and the struggle of not knowing how to text a girl you like. I've been there, so I've mastered how to text girls to help out guys like you.
I'll be breaking down all the things you need to know when texting girls plus, the all-too-common texting behavior you need to stop immediately.
This list of rules for texting girls is sure to get you more replies, boyfriend points, and, quite possibly, a date.
5 Rules For Texting Girls - How to Get Replies AND Dates!
Any man with a phone can probably understand how nerve-racking it is to come up with a perfectly good text to send out to the girl he likes. Don't even get him started with all those waiting times! A man will read, delete, and rewrite his message repeatedly just so he can get his crush to keep talking to her. Believe it or not, there's a right way to send her a text.
5 Texting Rules
1. Focus on the Goal
Just like in any other interaction, a back-and-forth text conversation with the girl you like can take on different turns on different topics. And in the course of trying to keep an interesting conversation going plus the pressure of figuring out what to text a girl, some men will often lose sight of the end goal- getting the girl to go out with you.
One good thing about text messaging is that it's a reliable way to get your crush to warm up to you. And while it's a good practice to take your time, endlessly beating around the bush, wishing for the woman to go out with you miraculously is not a winning strategy if you want to get a date with her.
Do you know the difference between a wish and a goal? A goal has a plan and an end date for accomplishment, and a wish is just a hopeless daydream. So when texting your crush, in addition to keeping the ball rolling, you might want to decide on asking her out eventually.
Remember, you're texting her now so you can ultimately ask her out. Trust me. You don't want to get inbox zoned. That's worse than getting friend-zoned. So keep your eyes on the prize, and get yourself a date!
2. Get Her Saying “Yes”
You don't just send a random text message to the person you like! You got to flirt effectively. I'll let you in on a little secret that I find very useful in real life and the dating world.
When a car salesman is trying to convince you to buy a car, he won't come right out and say, "Hey, do you want to buy this car?" because chances are, you're probably going to respond with "No, thank you." Instead, those sly car salesmen will build up to the big yes by piling up little yesses. Here's the secret- getting someone to initially and gradually say yes to smaller commitments is the trick to getting them to say "yes" on bigger ones.
So here's a piece of dating advice, when sending her a text message, the best questions to ask a girl are the ones that'll get you a yes each time. This is how you build up your yesses so you can get the big yes when you finally ask her out for a date.
For example, in a texting conversation, you might ask, "have you ever been on a bad date?" If she answers yes, ask her a follow-up question like, "do you ever wish a guy would take you on a proper date?" No woman in her right mind will answer no to that. You can even play your text game up by asking a question like, "what would be a perfect date for you?''
Now, I know that doesn't technically get a yes, but if you're going to ask her out, you might as well know what she likes, right? Once you know how her perfect date should look like, it's time to go for the kill and ask her out. Fingers crossed!
3. Intermittent Ghosting
After a first date and assuming it went well, you're going to want to keep in touch and keep her interested so that you can build up to a second date.
Here's where it's all too easy to mess up your mojo. Imagine this- you had a perfect first date, you're happy, you guys are texting more than ever- maybe even flirting a little, and you seem to be using more emojis in your texts than usual. You text each other like clockwork, and you just won't stop.
I get it. Just thinking about your prospective new romance can be intoxicating. And don't get me wrong, it is an exciting feeling, but you got to make a woman miss you a little. Think of palate cleansers. In dining, they're designed to stimulate one's appetite. The same goes with dating. Having an idle time where you give each other space instead of bombarding each other with cheesy messages day in and day out is the best way to keep the spark alive.
When flirting over SMS, an effective texting rule is to schedule a time for talking and a downtime. During your idle time, put your phone away and focus on other tasks- you can go to the gym, hang out with your friends, or learn a new skill. Generally, just try to act like a busy guy for an hour or two. Make sure you give her a heads up, though. You don't want her thinking that you're ignoring her for nothing.
All that waiting time will surely leave her wanting more of you. That's for sure.
4. Never Lay Down
Fellas, listen up. In the early stages of any budding romance, there's bound to be a lot of interaction over text, but when those familiar vibrations and pings get rarer and rarer, don't freak out. All is not lost.
If it seems your crush might be drifting, but you're still in contact, knowing how to flirt with a girl over text can be the key to keeping her interested and getting another date.
So when you start getting more maybes than yesses, and she's taking longer than normal to respond, there are two things you should do to get her back on the love train: the first thing is to start back at square one. Start working on building those easy yesses. The second thing to do is to dodge her objections head-on. If she says she can't meet up, or maybe you just can't seem to get her to commit to another date, don't lay down. Instead, stand your ground and prove you're worth it.
You might be wondering why she's pulling back. The reason is that as you continue dating, the relationship starts to take shape and starts feeling more serious. She's hesitating because she's afraid to make a mistake. Now, your job is to remind her why being with you is the best decision she could make and why you're a keeper.
Gentlemen, when wooing a woman over text, don't get discouraged with a few quibbles. All she needs is a little encouragement and a dash of reassurance to overcome her cold feet.
5. Call Her
Do you want to know how to get your crush to instantly like you? Catch her completely by surprise with this courtship technique that dates back to the 1980s.
Call her! Texting has become so common that it has edged out older forms of communication like talking on the phone and even face-to-face conversations. Several studies have confirmed that only a portion of communication is conveyed through actual words, and big chunks come from facial expression, body language, and tone of voice.
Texting is crazy useful and convenient, but it wouldn't be wise to rely on one form of communication when you have so many options to choose from, especially in this digitally modern time! If you can get her to send a smiley face over text using only a fraction of your ability to communicate, think about the myriad of feelings you can give to her with a phone call or a video call!
Just imagine what you can do with a call. You can sing to your crush, read her a love poem you wrote just for her, and if it's a video call, you can even have an online date night with her. You only need to be creative. So if you like the chick, give her a call.
The One Texting Behavior That Always Fails
Gentlemen, it's time for an etiquette lesson. Manners maketh man, so I have to be straight up with you about this particular texting style that is absolutely distasteful.
If you've been reading our blog for a while now, then you know that we frown upon the tasteless practice of sending unsolicited photographs of your ding-dong to unsuspecting women. But there's a more unsavory texting behavior that we have yet to dive into.
Disclaimer alert, we know that sex is good- it feels good, and it's actually healthy for you- it's a fact of life. What isn't good is "sexting," especially if you're texting a girl you just met.
Even though it's on your mind and probably on her mind, too, sexting too early on in a budding relationship is the fastest way to punch a one-way ticket to reject-town. Sexting is something you build up to, not dive right into, and more importantly, sexting is something you do with consent.
So before you pull the trigger on it, chill out, hold your horses, and start your text message with innocent flirting. Allow things to progress naturally. If she's into it, the girl might even lead you there herself.
But don't push it. If you play it wrong, you might end up as a cautionary tale for all of her girlfriends or, worse, social media. Oh, what a joke you would be. You don't want to be branded as the man who sexted his way out of a date, do you?
Frequently Asked Questions
So you met an attractive woman, and you want to start a conversation with her. But here you are stuck staring at your phone, clueless, and wondering where to start. It sure is tough being a guy, huh? Don't fret. Here are more pointers for you.
How do you grab a girl's attention over text without annoying or boring her?
Impressing your crush over a text conversation can be pretty frustrating when you don't know what to text a girl. One way to get her attention is to send her a cool pick-up line or a funny meme. Say, "Was your dad a boxer? Because damn, you're a knock-out!". Women respond to men who can make them laugh and are engaging, so keep the topic interesting. Ask her about her unforgettable life experiences, her hobbies, or her ambitions. And avoid double texting! You got to chill out.
What does it mean if a girl never texts you back?
There can be a lot of reasons why she didn't text back. On the one hand, she could be interested but has a lot on her plate and is putting her priorities first, or maybe she's just really shy. But if she NEVER replies to you, it's possible she has a boyfriend or is talking to another man. It's also likely that she only sees you as a friend. Or perhaps she's just not into you. If that's the case, move on, man.
How do you tell if a girl likes you over text?
So you want to know how to tell if a girl likes you over text. Whenever I start talking to a girl I like, I'd always look for these surefire signs. One, she initiates the conversation- if she likes you back, it wouldn't be just you trying to keep the conversation going. Second, she flirts back- if she teases back, you must be doing something right! Lastly, she asks about you- unless she likes you back, she wouldn't even care about getting to know you.
How do you get better at texting and interacting with girls?
This may sound run-of-the-mill but hear me out here. If you want to get better at interacting with girls, learn from the men behind your screen. Seriously. James Bond, Ethan Hawke, Ryan Gosling, and Brad Pitt? These guys can certainly walk the talk. You don't have to look like them. You just have to learn their moves.
How hard is it for a shy girl to start a conversation over text?
If she's a really shy person, it might not be easy for her to break the ice even through text messages. Shy girls are shy on and off-screen, so if you're crushing on an introverted gal, you might want to take one for the team and be the one to start the conversation.
More Tips On How To Get The Girl
Here are a few more texting tips to help you bring your A-game the next time you send a love note for your belle.
- There's nothing like waking up to a sweet text message. Start her day right with these good morning texts for her. They'll keep her smiling all day long, that's for sure.
- Are you lost in thought? At a loss for words? I got you, bro. Never stress about breaking the ice with these text conversation starters.
- Okay, so you got her number. But can you flirt? If you're unsure, then you probably can't. These flirty texts for her can make any girl swoon.
A true gentleman remains well-spoken on and off-screen. Before sending out another message, make sure to keep in mind these rules for texting girls.
Now that you know how to text a girl you like and how to text girls in general, it shouldn't be too hard for you to get any woman's attention.
I hope you enjoyed this list of rules for texting girls. Remember rule number one? Great. Go get her.