Anyone who’s in a relationship should know some good questions for couples.
…Because communication is essential to a healthy relationship, with couples who talk regularly enjoying the benefits of a deeper, more intimate and connected relationship. By taking the time to consider important questions for couples, you can strengthen your connection to your partner and avoid unnecessary arguments from misunderstandings.
But where do you start? These couple questions are a great place to start thinking about the right questions to ask to help you and your partner get to know each other better. Choose a few questions to ask your girlfriend from the lists that follow to jump-start your relationship’s conversations and communication.
Conversation starters for couples are a bit different than your average conversation starters. After all, you already know each other better than the average person — so asking everyday couple questions like “how’s your day going?” just doesn’t make as much sense.
Here are 7 conversation starters for couples:
1. What is the most daring thing that you have done till date?
While your girlfriend may not be a dedicated risk-taker, she definitely has done something risky worth talking about.
2. What’s an ideal weekend for you?
It’s easy to get caught in a weekend routine that you don’t really enjoy. How can you plan to make your weekends better together?
3. If a genie granted you 3 wishes right now, what would you wish for?
Asking about her desires and wishes is a great way to start a conversation about what she wants out of life.
4. If you had one day left to live on the Earth, what would you do?
What is most important to her? Her answers to this question can spark a longer conversation about priorities.
5. Which animal do you think is my spirit animal?
Silly, off-hand questions like this will get her involved in a fun, playful conversation with you.
6. What’s the craziest job you would consider taking?
Work is a huge part of anyone’s life. This couple questions asks how she could mix up her work life.
7. If you had to spend 1 million dollars in one day, what would you buy?
Financial priorities determine a lot for a person’s life. What are hers?
These random questions to ask your girlfriend are perfect for times when you’d be watching Netlfix or checking Facebook; use that time to get to know each other better, and your relationship will benefit from it.
Here are 12 random questions for couples:
8. Are you still in touch with your childhood friends?
Childhood friends will understand things about her that nobody else ever will. Being in touch with them is great for her happiness.
9. What is the best prank you have pulled off yet?
Does she have a mischievous, naughty side? Sharing this can lead to random insights about her.
10. What is the most expensive thing you have ever bought?
Splurge purchases may not always be the best idea, but what she spends her money on is a good indicator of her priorities.
11. Have you ever done something embarrassing in public?
Learning to deal with embarrassment is an essential adult skill. How did she learn it?
12. What’s the most impulsive thing you’ve ever done?
Even if she’s not an impulsive person, her impulsive choices may be a great place to start a conversation.
13. Where would you rate yourself as a kisser on a scale of 1 to 10?
Of course, this question leads easily into her “proving” her rating to you…
14. What type of cologne do you prefer on a man?
If she has a favorite scent, with positive memories of it, you may just want to try wearing it yourself.
15. What kind of clothing and fashion do you find most appealing?
Knowing how she likes to see you dressed is a great way to encourage her desire for you.
16. Which animal would you like to ride on at least once in your lifetime?
Funny and unexpected, this question is good to lighten up any mood.
17. What is one that job you would never do, even for a million dollars?
What’s more important to her than money? Learning her dislikes is as important as learning her preferences.
18. If you had to switch lives with someone, who would you choose?
Whose life is she envious of? Or would she rather keep her own?
19. If you had the superpower of invisibility, how would you use it?
Would she use her powers for good, or for evil? Either way, it’s a fun question to talk about.
Would you rather questions are part of a classic party game for good reason: By forcing a decision between two options, they have a way of bringing out either more honest answers or hilarious choices.
Here are 9 would you rather questions for couples:
20. Would you rather have super sight or super hearing?
Superpower questions ask us to think about what life would be like without our limitations.
21. Would you rather fight King Kong or a T-Rex?
Whichever one she chooses to fight, you can continue to make it funnier by asking how she would win the fight (or lose it).
22. Would you rather stop using the internet or stop using deodorant?
This may be the toughest “would you rather” question for the modern generation. Which is more important to her?
23. Would you rather be the funniest person alive or the most attractive?
Humor is attractive in its own way — but is it more important to her than looks?
24. Would you rather be unable to lie or unable to speak?
Lying is a deep part of our social interactions; would she rather “say something nice or not say anything at all”?
25. Would you rather vacation with your family or vacation by yourself?
How would she most like to enjoy her time off?
26. Would you rather change any one decision from you past or have $40,000 free and clear?
What is it worth to her to change the past? This can be a great opportunity to talk about mutual regrets.
27. Would you rather be the hero or the villain?
Good or bad, both heroes and villains have their attractive qualities.
28. Would you rather have one dream come true or give that chance to your significant other?
Altruism — making choices for the best of others — may lead to greater happiness.
Keeping the romance alive in your relationship can be a challenge — and asking romantic couple questions can be a powerful way to keep your relationship intimate and exciting.
Here are 11 romantic questions for couples:
29. What is your wildest fantasy?
Though she may not answer this question the first time it’s asked, it’ll definitely get her thinking about her fantasies — and how you play in those.
30. What do you think makes me smile?
Something as simple as a smile can be a powerful way to connect with each other.
31. What do I do that turns you on the most?
By making the question personal and specific to your relationship, you can learn just how to make her day that much more exciting.
32. What is your idea of a perfect romantic date?
Why not come right out and ask how to make a special date with her? Then add your own personal touch to whatever she suggests.
33. What is your favorite part of your body to be kissed on?
This question is perfect to ask in a text message during the work day; save the info for when you get home together.
34. What do you remember most about our first kiss?
Capturing the magic of your first moments together, and reliving it, is a sure way to bring you closer together.
35. What’s the most romantic thing I have ever done for you?
Because romance is such a personal, individual thing, her answer may surprise you!
36. What is your favorite trait of mine?
Be sure to be ready to share what your favorite trait of hers is, as well!
37. Whats that one thing about our relationship that makes you the happiest?
Focusing on the positive parts of your relationship can be a great way to create a more optimistic future together.
38. Which song comes to your mind and heart that reminds you of me?
Music influences our relationships — what type of music does she associate with you?
39. What is your idea of a perfect honeymoon spot?
Dreaming of time together in idyllic settings can be a fun way to spend an afternoon or evening together.
Putting in the work in a relationship to make a deep, stable connection is an imperfect process, but a very rewarding one all the same. Taking the time to figure out deep questions to ask your girlfriend can open the door to new levels of intimacy, and this selection of deep questions to ask is sure to help you with that.
Here are 11 deep questions for couples:
40. Is it easy for you to show yourself love or speak kindly to yourself?
We need to love ourselves before we can truly love others. How can you help her with this self-love?
41. Do you think that true love really exists in this world?
What is true love, after all? It’s a fantastic topic of deep discussion.
42. What do you find yourself insecure about?
Security in relationships builds stability, and being honest about insecurities can bring you closer together.
43. What scares you the most?
Learning to embrace your fear in relationships contributes to stronger, lasting connections.
44. What did your last relationship teach you?
Being able to learn from past relationships is a key way to ensure future happiness.
45. If you could change anything about your past, what would it be?
Women may have more relationship regrets than men; talking about this can be a road to a deep conversation.
46. Who is the first person you call when you’re in trouble?
Who she relies on in times of trouble says a lot about her deepest relationships.
47. Do you think confessions make a relationship stronger?
If so, this is a great opportunity to honestly confess to your failures in a safe environment.
48. How long does it take you to really trust someone?
Trust isn’t built overnight. Knowing how long it takes to build trust with her gives you a good idea of where you stand in your relationship.
49. What’s the one thing that people always misunderstand about you?
Does she have something about her that takes time to understand? Asking this lets you know where to put work into understanding your relationship.
50. Are you satisfied with the life you are living?
Finding satisfaction in life is a complicated process, but talking about it can help both of you understand your lives together more clearly.
When you’ve been with someone long enough, conversation can start to run a little dry. You’ve gone through all the basics. That’s the exact moment you need questions to ask your significant other that can perk the conversation right back up.
Use a few of these to force your way out of the doldrums and into lively, enjoyable conversation.
Here are 7 questions to ask your significant other:
51. What food reminds you of me?
They may not have an answer off hand, but it’s a new way to think of you, that’s for sure.
52. What’s a question you’ve never asked me?
Get them to ask it now. It may be important.
53. What do you think we need to work on the most in our relationship?
A tough questions to ask, but incredibly necessary.
54. What is your favorite thing I ever did for a special occasion for you?
It’s almost cheating. Take the answer and do a version of that next time.
55. When we are with my family, do I make you feel like you’re still my priority?
You need an answer to this if you want to keep your significant other significant.
56. What was the very first thing you thought about me?
Have fun going through old memories together.
57. How long do you think people should wait before having kids?
A fun conversation for speculation, and potentially important down the line.
Building a relationship takes honesty and straightforwardness, but it can be difficult to know how to introduce those qualities up front. The best way is through relationship questions for couples that really get at what you need to talk about, uncomfortable or not.
Use these questions when it’s just you and your partner to start talking and making your relationship stronger.
Here are 9 relationship questions for couples:
58. What do you consider your best and worst qualities?
Find about about how they see themselves.
59. Are you friends with any of your exes?
Talk about how you approach old relationships.
60. What’s your definition of cheating?
It may seem obvious to you, but people see this differently.
61. If you won the lottery tomorrow, how would you lead your life moving forward?
Discuss what an ideal life looks like.
62. What soothes you the most on the back of bad news or a tough day?
You’ll need to know this because there will eventually be bad news.
63. In what circumstances do you think it’s okay to fib?
Where’s the line on lying in the relationship?
64. How would you respond if one of us was offered a job that required a lot of traveling?
Don’t leave this one until the job actually appears.
65. What’s your ideal climate for establishing a permanent home?
If it comes time for settling down, you’ll want to know if you both want the house on the beach or in the mountains.
66. How would you react if we had trouble getting pregnant?
It happens to a lot of couples, discuss it upfront.
Step #1: Be Patient
When you’re thinking about how to start a conversation with your significant other, you have it much easier than starting to talk to a stranger. Why? Because you know you’ll be seeing each other, you can be patient and wait for the best time for you both to talk.
Step #2: Set Aside Time
Because you know you’ll be seeing each other, starting an intimate conversation with your girlfriend can be best accomplished by setting aside time specifically for it. Ask her when would be a good time to set aside to get to know each other better, turn off your phones and computers, and sit down with the express purpose of having a conversation together.
Step #3: Limit Distractions
By taking the time to turn off your cell phone, power down your computer, and spend time together just the two of you, you open the door to more genuine conversations. Not only does this give you a chance to take a break from the outside world together, but it also lets you focus on what each other have to say and create a deeper, more intimate connection.
Downloadable List of Questions for Couples
Here is a downloadable list of questions for couples (right click the image and select Save Image As…):
More Questions for Couples
Looking for more questions like this? Take a look at these other articles that will jump-start your thinking and get you on the road to asking great questions together:
- Just started dating? Try out our Questions to Ask a Girl/Questions to Ask a Guy to get a better general introduction to each other.
- Been dating for a few months, but still don’t know each other very well? Get more personal with our Questions to Ask to Get to Know a Girl/Questions to Ask to Get to Know a Guy.
- If she’s particularly difficult to get to open up in conversations, try our Interesting Questions to Ask a Girl — they’re especially good at stimulating very intellectual women.
That’s 50 questions for couples, sure to spark genuine conversation between you and your sweetheart.
Whether you’re looking for questions to ask in a new relationship, or questions to ask your girlfriend after you’ve been together for a while, keep some of these in mind. Or better yet — memorize a few of them, so you don’t feel “on the spot” when the right time for a conversation comes along.
And remember — communication is essential to healthy relationships… So talk with each other as often as you can!