Funny would you rather questions are a blast to ask.
They can turn any conversation into a hilarious and ridiculous exchange. They’re questions to ask when you’re sitting around a table with friends, one on one with a girl you like, or bored at school, in between classes. Traditionally, they’re questions with two different choices, both equally challenging to decide on.
Now: I’ve played the game two ways:
The first, you can’t change anything. What you answer is what you get and you can’t get surgery or an exterminator or do any sort of action to change the outcome of your answer or to fix what you decide on. Nothing can change.
The second, you can ask questions before you decide. The question master makes up the rules. Check out Scott Aukerman’s podcast, Comedy Bang Bang! for an idea of how the rules work. It’s a fun way to play if you have a creative and quick-witted mind.
Of course, you don’t have to stick to these methods and can make as many changes as you want!
With this list, we’ll be sticking with funny questions to ask while playing Would You Rather. I’ve separated the list into sections to make it more accessible. Feel free to skip around or read it all the way through. You’re bound to find a few funny would you rather questions to bring about a silly time.
62 Good, Extremely Funny Would You Rather Questions
To make this resource even better/easier for you to use… I broke down the questions into a few different sections (from the best questions to use early on, to more extreme, really hard would you rather questions).
I recommend looking through each section, but if you want to jump to one in particular, you can use the links below:
And since you want to be funny, we have a list of funny conversation starters that may help but since most of you are here for funny would you rather questions, here are our top 13 funny would you rather conversation starters to get things moving in the right direction.
Here are the 13 best funny would you rather conversation starters:
1. Would you rather have to announce to everyone around you whenever you have to fart or pee your pants daily?
I mean, you already don’t announce your farts?
2. Would you rather fight 100 duck sized horses or 1 horse sized duck?
The classic Reddit question. Lots of variations too.
3. Would you rather be a tree or have to live in a tree for the rest of your life?
Fun fact: Aspen trees aren’t individual trees. An Aspen grove is actually one living organism.
4. You’re in a crowded room, would you rather fart loudly and everyone laughs at you, or be the only one laughing obnoxiously when someone else farts?
Farts are hilarious and nobody can claim otherwise.
5. Would you rather begin every sentence with “Hey idiot” or end every sentence with “…Ha ha, I was just kidding.”
Who needs meaningful relationships anyway?
6. Would you rather live one life that lasts 1,000 years or live 10 lives that last 100 years each?
7. Would you rather be without elbows or be without knees?
Head, shoulders, knees and toes. Why didn’t they include elbows in that song? They’re just as important.
8. Would you rather fart really loud or poop your pants silently?
Silent but deadly.
9. Would you rather have diarrhea every day for the next 3 months or be constipated every day for the next 3 months?
Drink lots of water!
10. Would you rather use eye drops made of vinegar or toilet paper made from sandpaper?
Half water half vinegar solutions make a great bathroom cleaner.
11. Would you rather be a clown who distracts the bull or the cowboy who rides the bull?
12. Would you rather have to go to the bathroom in a giant litter box in your house or anywhere you want, but only outside?
According to my vet, if you feed your cats higher quality cat food, they’ll go to the restroom less, saving you money!
13. Would you rather have 500 tarantulas crawling in your house or 1000 crickets jumping around your room?
Crickets can be used as an alarm system because they stop chirping when someone comes near. Tarantulas have a defense mechanism where they use their hind legs to rub the hair off their thorax, which can embed themselves into the skin or eyes of their attacker, causing irritation.
The best of the best. These would you rather questions are hard to answer, but are guaranteed to make people smile.
Here are our 8 best funny would you rather questions:
14. Would you rather have your breath smell like a bad fart or have your laugh sound like a fart?
Hahahaha! Excuse me.
15. Would you rather have bad breath or smelly feet?
16. Would you rather go about your normal day naked or fall asleep for a year?
This is a tough one for me because they both sound wonderful.
17. Would you rather always take a cold shower or sleep an hour less than you need to be fully rested?
Sleep is for the weak and hot showers dry your skin out.
18. Would you rather always wear earmuffs or a nose plug?
Avoid unpleasant sounds, or unpleasant smells?
19. Would you rather have a Texas accent and live in New York or a New York accent and live in Texas?
In 1997 the ratio of New Yorkers bitten by rats to the number bitten by other New Yorkers was 1:7.
20. Would you rather marry a vain person or a person with poor image?
I look so good, it makes me sad because nobody can compare.
21. Would you rather have a freakishly huge smile or a freakishly small nose?
Janie’s got a gun and it’s because she was tormented for her freakishly small nose.
You have some questions to ask a girl in your mental Rolodex and you’ve asked all the funny questions to ask a girl that you can think of and the conversation has turned to would you rather questions.
Here are 14 funny would you rather questions to ask a girl:
22. Would you rather eat the same meal for the rest of your life or never use Instagram again?
What’s the point of having an Instagram if all of your pictures are the same?
23. Would you rather be told to stop being so sensitive every day or be asked if you are PMSing every day?
Irritable Male Syndrome apparently exists but not for the reasons you might think.
24. Would you rather wear a pushup bra all day long, every day or stiletto heels all day long, every day?
I don’t know enough about pushup bras to give an honest answer. I’ve worn heels for 5 minutes once though and they’re terrible.
25. Would you rather make love with the lights off or with the lights on?
26. Would you rather have to sneeze but not be able to or have something stuck in your eye for an entire year?
I’ve had something in my eye for the past three days and I’m losing my mind.
27. Would you never have painful cramps again or never have to shave again?
Cramps are more than tummy rumbles, fellas.
28. Would you rather give up shopping for six months or give up emoji for six months?
That means no trips to Sephora or Lush.
29. Would you rather have to get up at dawn or stay up 3 AM every day?
Party all night or start your day off right?
30. Would you rather be able to stop time or fly?
And what would you do with it?
31. Would you rather give up your computer or your pet?
This one hits close to home considering I want to be a traveling freelance writer but I have two cats.
32. Would you rather be a deep-sea diver or an astronaut?
33. Would you rather publish your diary or make a movie on your most embarrassing moment?
Which can I make the most money from?
34. Would you rather be a giant hamster or a tiny rhino?
As a giant hamster, you could live in the Sky Tubes at Chuck E. Cheese’s. As a tiny rhino, you’d be adorable.
35. Would you rather meet The Red Hot Chili Peppers or Justin Timberlake?
And there ain’t no woman that could take your spot, my love. (Except California).
Maybe you’re looking for would you rather questions for couples because you’ve noticed your conversations with your girlfriend have gotten monotonous.
No worries! Asking questions for couples is important to keep a relationship strong and these ones will keep things funny and fun. You’ll certainly learn a thing or two about her.
Here are 6 funny would you rather questions for couples:
36. Would you rather have a dragon or be a dragon?
Who doesn’t want to be the Mother of Dragons? Then again, who doesn’t want to be a dragon?
37. Would you rather have cookies or have French fries?
Sweets or starches?
38. Would you rather have one wish granted today or three wishes granted in 10 years?
Your magic 8 ball holds the answer to this question.
39. Would you rather wake up with a different face but same gender or different gender but same face?
This sounds confusing for everyone involved.
40. Would you rather be trapped in an elevator with an old lady and her 3 wet dogs or 3 fat men with bad breath?
Everything has to go to the bathroom at some point.
41. Would you rather have your hand stuck in a jar or your head stuck in a bucket?
Nothing like some classic slapstick.
When you want to get to know someone, you ask get to know you questions! They’re great for finding out more about the person you’re talking to and our list of funny get to know you questions will help you achieve this with an air of hilarity.
Here are 12 funny would you rather questions to get to know someone:
42. Would you rather give up alcohol for a year or give up your smartphone for a month?
Having trouble sleeping? Don’t bring your phone to bed.
43. Would you rather be super fast or super strong?
The Flash or The Incredible Hulk?
44. Would you rather be the smartest kid in school or the most popular kid in school?
Bookworm or social butterfly?
45. Would you rather be a police officer or be a firefighter?
46. Would you rather be rich and ugly, or Poor and good-looking?
Money isn’t everything unless you’re poor.
47. Would you rather meet an alien visitor or travel to outer space?
Some say that if an alien race was advanced enough to visit us, there’s a pretty good chance we wouldn’t even be able to comprehend what was happening if they decided to exterminate us. We’d be the forest animals and they’d be the loggers.
48. Would you rather only be able to whisper or only be able to shout?
Sound is just things vibrating at different frequencies. Here’s an impressive example.
49. Would you rather be the sand castle or the wave?
The largest recorded wave was 100 feet high.
50. Would you rather get even or get over it?
51. Would you rather give bad advice or take bad advice?
You can’t really win either way.
52. Would you rather live without music or live without T.V.?
No more Game of Thrones or no more Nickelback?
53. Would you rather be super strong or change into animals?
You remember Animorphs, right?
You’ve reached the tough ones. Hard would you rather questions require your brain to kick into overdrive and think deeply on which path to take.
Here are 10 really hard, really funny would you rather questions:
54. Would you rather Jell-o wrestle nude in front of your family or wear a diaper and act like a baby in front of someone you have a crush on?
Don’t be such a baby.
55. Would you rather never laugh again or never use your smartphone again?
How will you ever enjoy cat gifs?
56. Would you rather be gossiped about or never talked about at all?
The most “popular” or the most boring?
57. Would you rather forget who you were or who everyone else was?
If you’re a fan of short-term memory loss, check out the movie Memento (2000).
58. Would you rather be born with an elephant trunk or a giraffe neck?
Both would be useful but look unfortunate.
59. Would you rather be forgotten or hatefully remembered?
What kind of legacy works for you?
60. Would you rather fight Mike Tyson or talk like him for the rest of your life?
Thaths a sthilly questhtion.
61. Would you rather have everything you eat tastes like boogers or have only one eye?
Boogers are mostly just dirt. Having an excuse to wear an eye patch would be cool though.
62. Would you rather lick an old man’s stinky armpit or chew on a rotten yellow toenail?
How’s your stomach feeling?
Congratulations! You’re now an expert at asking funny would you rather questions! If you use them at the right times, you’ll be known as the guy who always has funny questions to ask and can keep a conversation hilarious.