Questions to ask a girl over text are one of the most powerful tools a guy can have… because, like most of us guys have found:
There’s no denying that our modern, technology-driven world has changed the way we communicate — and while this can seem complicated, it also gives more opportunities than ever before to have a selection of great questions to ask a girl you like.
By learning a few simple, straightforward questions to ask a girl over text, you can be prepared to make the best of every opportunity that is presented to you.
Without the pressure of an on-the-spot interaction, you can take your time to choose the best questions to ask. With that in mind, we put together this guide as a reference for you to come back to again and again to find the perfect question to ask a girl over text in any conversation.
Most of the time, it seems like finding the right way to start a text message conversation can be the hardest part. If you’re already in a relationship, conversation starters for couples can focus on what you already know about each other — but what if you’ve only just met the girl you’re thinking about texting?
Here’s the deal: If you’ve only recently got a girl’s number, your conversation starters have to take a different tone. After you’ve said a friendly hello, start with easy questions that have the widest variety of possible answers.
Here are 15 conversation starters to ask a girl over text:
1. What’s the best thing that’s happened to you today?
Keep it positive! Instead of asking “how’s your day?”, lead the conversation in a better direction right from the start.
2. What kinds of things really make you laugh?
Even just thinking about funny things puts her in a better mood, which starts the conversation warmly and positively.
3. What’s your favorite place in the entire world?
Use this conversation starter to start planning where you might be able to meet up together later.
4. Favorite movie of all time?
Remember that movie you just couldn’t get enough of as a kid? Bring back those nostalgic memories by starting a conversation with this question.
5. What’s your biggest goal in life right now?
This opens the door to talking about similarities between things you’re working on in your lives.
6. What is your favorite way to spend a Saturday?
Planning ahead to the weekend gives you time to find the right way to ask her to make plans with you later.
7. What kind of music do you listen to?
Look for shared passions in music, or an opportunity to share new music with each other down the road.
8. What were you like as a kid?
Did she have a favorite activity that she’s since stopped? Could you do some of those things together now?
9. What should I know about you that I’d never think to ask about?
This leaves the direction of the conversation up to her, so use it if you already have a good feeling that she wants to get to know you better.
10. If you could travel anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?
Fantasizing about travel together could get you both on the same page and lead to further conversations.
11. What was your favorite TV show as a kid?
Bringing up childhood memories is always a great way to start a conversation with her.
12. If you could own one exotic animal, what would you choose?
Funny and unexpected, this interesting question helps differentiate you from other, less-funny guys.
13. Would you rather have a superpower of your choice, or infinite money?
Though Batman proves that money is a sort of superpower, this is another unexpected starter that leads her to respond thoughtfully.
14. Would you ever live in a foreign country?
Not only does this test how adventurous she is, it also leads directly into a conversation about why she would or which country she might choose.
15. Do you prefer staying indoors, or going outdoors?
Once you learn more about her preferences, you’ll know better what sort of date you would both enjoy.
These questions are our go-to favorites. If you’re ever at a loss as to how to continue texting a girl, choose one of these to inject new life into the conversation.
Here are 19 the best questions to ask a girl over text:
16. What are you up to this weekend?
You can always test the waters with this one; if she answers vaguely, you can always move to a different question.
17. Do you like tacos, margaritas, good music, and great company?
And a mischievous follow-up: “I know where to find at least one of those ;)”
18. What kind of trouble are you getting into today?
Playful and cheeky, this text leaves it up to her to imagine what you mean by “trouble”.
19. If you could travel the World, where would you go?
Whatever her answer is, you can easily build on it by asking what interests her about that place.
20. When was the last time you got into trouble?
The subtext of this text asks whether she’s willing to take risks (even if she gets caught!).
21. What’s the most perfect dipping sauce?
Rick and Morty knows the importance of the perfect dipping sauce… Does she?
22. If a genie appeared to grant you one wish, what would you wish for?
What is it that she wants most in her life right now, and how does that relate to you?
23. If you could be any animal, which would you choose to be? Why?
Her answer will reveal how she thinks of herself, giving you more info on how to make a connection with her.
24. What sport would you never want to play?
Knowing a girl’s limits can help you understand what’s most appropriate to talk about.
25. If you could have one superpower, what would it be and why?
Her choice will reveal something about what she would most like to change about herself right now.
26. What is something that is popular now that annoys you?
You can bond over mutual annoyances with this text.
27. What did you do on your last vacation?
Bringing up good memories will encourage her to talk more about them.
28. Are you very active of do you prefer to just relax in your free time?
This will let you know what sort of activities to suggest doing together.
29. What’s the best thing about your work?
Framing work in a positive light lets her tell you what makes her work worthwhile.
30. What were you really into when you were a kid?
The things she loved as a kid have affected the person she’s grown into today, too.
31. What three words best describe you?
32. What would be your perfect weekend?
Getting her thinking about positive things will push the conversation in a positive direction.
33. What’s your favorite cartoon?
Grown-ups can watch cartoons, too — maybe you could find one to watch together?
34. What’s your favorite song to sing in the shower?
Let her embrace her inner pop star for a moment, and you’ll learn what music she likes when no one else is around.
Here are 12 flirty questions to ask a girl over text:
35. When you look at a guy, what’s the first thing you notice?
If she answers warmly and responsively, why not ask her what she first noticed about you, too?
36. If you could be invisible for the day, what’s the first thing you would do?
The subtext of this question asks: “What would you do if you could get away with it?”
37. Have you ever been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to?
If she answers “yes”, she may not want to tell you what — making for a fun guessing game of trying to figure it out.
38. When was the last time you did something outside of your comfort zone?
This might be one of my favorites, because it lets you gauge where you’re at as far as her comfort levels go.
39. Would you rather have super strength, or x-ray vision?
Because everyone knows that X-ray vision is really only good for seeing through everyone’s clothes…
40. What’s one item on your “bucket list”?
And could you check it off together?
41. What’s your spirit animal?
No matter her answer, you can look for the “naughty” qualities in the animal she chooses.
42. Ever been in love with 2 people at the same time?
It carries a powerful subtext: What has her love life been like?
43. How often do you stay up past 3 a.m.?
44. Have you ever broken someone’s heart?
You’ll find out whether she has a little bit of “bad girl” in her with this question.
45. Can you wiggle your nose or your ears?
Strictly because it’s cute, and she’ll probably have to try and do it (for you).
46. What do you think of tattoos? Do you have any?
This is a sly way of asking her about her body without it being obviously sexual.
Mark Twain once said that “humor is mankind’s greatest blessing.” Having a good selection of funny questions to ask can instantly brighten an otherwise dreary day.
Being willing to put yourself out there and try to make someone laugh is a huge sign of confidence, and a big turn-on for women. Equipping yourself with a few funny questions to ask a girl is a sure way to keep your conversation going smoothly.
Test out your laugh muscles with these 15 funny questions:
47. If you had to make out with a friend of the same sex to save the world from aliens, whom would you pick?
A funny but high-risk question, save this one for when the conversation is already going very well.
48. Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours?
And how would you want to be tied? The funny (and flirtatious) scenarios you can make up out of this are nearly endless.
49. Do one legged ducks swim in circles?
50. Would you consider yourself obsessed with anything/anyone?
Does she have a collection of Pusheen stuffed animals? A complete Pokedex? No matter what it is, you can kind-heartedly poke fun at her obsession.
51. Do you like to sing in the shower or the car when no one is around?
Follow-up: What do you sing? Bonus points if you can get her to voice-record it!
52. Do you still wear a piece of clothing you wore during your childhood?
Like Linus’s comfort blanket, there’s something inherently funny about juvenile habits.
53. If your five-year-old self suddenly found themselves inhabiting your current body, what would your five-year-old self do first?
Put her back in the mindset of her childhood, and she’s more likely to find everything that follows just a little bit funnier.
54. What is something that everyone looks stupid doing?
Play the mental image game with this one: Who can make up a more ridiculous scene for the other to imagine?
55. What is the most embarrassing thing you have ever worn?
A logical next step is to ask to see the funny pictures of her in the outfit.
56. If you were arrested with no explanation, what would your friends and family assume you had done?
Here she’ll reveal her most “bad girl” quality, which you’re free to jest at afterwards.
57. Quick: What’s your best dirty bar joke?
Everyone should have at least one dirty joke to tell in mixed company; this puts the conversation firmly in her hands for a moment.
58. What’s your funniest “dad joke”?
If she has a knack for these flat-falling jokes, you may have just found yourself a keeper.
59. What would be the absolute worst name you could give your child?
Then, play the game of imagining how that baby would grow up, and what it would be like as a child and adult.
60. What would the world be like if it was filled with male and female copies of you?
You’ll prompt her to think of both her most masculine and feminine qualities, after which hilarity will ensue.
61. Do dentists go to other dentists or do they just do it themselves?
Take advantage of a strong visual imagination with this one, guaranteed to get at least a chuckle.
By knowing the right questions to ask to get to know a girl, you open the door for building more comfort and connection. With a good introduction, and after a little bit of funny and flirty conversation, you can begin to build the comfort that will lead to a face-to-face date.
Essentially, all of these get to know you questions are made with a goal in mind of learning her preferences, positive and negative, so that you can better plan what sort of activities you can do together.
Here are 14 great question to ask a girl over text to get to know her:
62. Which bad habits of people drive you crazy?
Getting to know a girl means asking about what she likes and what she dislikes.
63. Who was the last person you hugged?
Some girls are huggers, and some aren’t — either way, it’s important to know for the next time you see her.
64. How would you change the world if you were to play god for a day?
You can learn what she’d most like to change about the world with this question.
65. If you had to eat 1 thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
“You are what you eat” — meaning that the type of food a girl chooses says a lot about her personality.
66. Name three things you have never done and don’t want to do?
To really get to know her, it’s important to know her preferences and her limitations.
67. What are the 3 most important things in a kitchen and why?
Because let’s face it: Any0ne who knows there way around a kitchen instantly becomes more attractive.
68. What are you allergic to?
Maybe not the most creative question, but an incredibly important one to know if you plan on asking her out to a meal.
69. What do you do in your free time?
Knowing what she does with her spare time can help you brainstorm activities to do together.
70. If you could play any instrument, which would you play?
Every instrument has its own personality, so whatever she chooses will reveal more of how she thinks about herself.
71. What’s the most useful thing you own?
The things she prioritizes in her life will clue you in to what is most important to her.
72. What is the strangest dream you have ever had?
Our dreams are a reflection of our subconscious: By learning about hers, you might learn about her motivations in life.
73. Do you have any irrational fears?
We’re all scared of something; what about her?
74. If you could learn any language fluently what would it be?
If you start with this question, it’ll flow naturally into a conversation of where she’d like to travel to.
75. Do you like your music loud or easy listening?
This one’s important to know if you’re going to invite her out to catch some live music with you.
So what happens to texting once you’re in a relationship?
Well, to tell you the truth… a lot of guys make a big mistake. They stop texting their girlfriend like they did when they were first getting to know each other, and that makes text conversations go stale.
You know what, though? I don’t think you’re that type of guy. So let’s keep finding interesting and worthwhile questions to ask a girlfriend over text, whether you’ve been dating for 2 months or 2 years.
Here are 16 questions to ask your girlfriend over text:
76. Tell me the truth…how many selfies do you have on your phone?
Being lighthearted and playful with texts like this helps to keep that spark in your relationship.
77. What is (or was) your least favorite class/teacher?
It’s just as important to know what your girlfriend dislikes as it is to know what she likes.
78. What do you do when you’re bored?
Up next: Invite her to text you funny pictures when she’s bored!
79. If you find 100$ on the floor right now, what would you do with it?
It’s not winning the lottery, and that’s a good thing: This gives you an attainable goal of something that would make her happier.
80. Do you think you could give up technology for a week?
Because how often do you get to spend time together without being on your phones or computers?
81. What’s the most-played song on your iPod?
Knowing what your girlfriend listens to in the privacy of her headphones is a special sort of intimacy.
82. What’s the lamest joke you’ve ever heard?
Ask her to bring out her best dad jokes! All the better if this starts an awful joke text contest between you.
83. Would you prefer a day at the beach or movie marathon?
Gather information on the sly with this one to help you plan your next weekend getaway.
84. What was the last funny video you saw?
Use the magic of the internet to share in a few laughs even while you’re apart.
85. What do you do to get rid of stress?
100% of scientists agree: Less stressed girlfriends are happier girlfriends. Anything you can do to help her de-stress is always a good idea.
86. Who in your life brings you the most joy?
And how can you help her prioritize that person in her life? No (wo)man is an island, after all.
87. Where is the most beautiful place you have been?
Bring fond memories back to her mind, and you’ll also get to know a type of location that would make a great date spot.
88. What’s your favorite season? Why?
Every season tells something about a person’s personality; does she like to bundle up, or live as clothes-free as possible?
89. Where is the most beautiful place near where you live?
This one’s just begging for a follow-up of planning a picnic date wherever her answer is.
90. Do you believe in karma?
And if she does, what has she done lately that scored her some “good karma“?
91. What was the last song you danced to?
If you know what music moves your girlfriend, you can play that same song later when the time is right for you to dance together.
It’s surprisingly easy to make a text conversation more personal. You just have to have the right personal questions to ask.
We’ve compiled a list of personal questions to ask a girl that work great over text.
Below you’ll find the best of them.
Here are 7 personal questions to ask a girl over text:
92. What is the best/worst/embarrassing/weirdest text message you’ve received?
She probably has a hilarious screenshot of it.
93. Have you ever dropped a phone in the toilet?
If your phone gets wet, they say to place it in rice. It might absorb the moisture.
94. Which app do you suggest I install on my phone?
There are millions of apps out there you haven’t heard of. I recommend ours.
95. What is the best selfie you’ve taken with your phone? Send it to me.
She won’t send you photos if you don’t ask.
96. What is your current wallpaper on your phone?
If it’s something artsy, you can get an idea of her aesthetic.
97. What was your last watched YouTube video? Send it to me.
You can spend hours sending silly videos back and forth. It’s hilarious and tons of fun.
98. What is the first thing you do with your phone after you wake up in the morning?
This opens up the topic of morning routines.
It’s like this: Whether it’s a girl that you’ve just met, or your girlfriend that you’ve been seeing for a while, you always need to be learning more deeply about them.
By removing the necessity for an immediate response, having a few deep questions to ask over text can lessen the tension of being put “on the spot”, giving her more time to come up with a thoughtful answer. How much you share is up to you, but it’s essential to test the waters.
Here are 20 personal and deep questions to ask a girl or girlfriend over text:
99. If you choose any 3 people to be stranded on a desert island with, who would you choose and why?
The people we choose to spend time around deeply influence who we become. This question will let you know who she is most deeply and personally influenced by.
100. If you were guaranteed honest responses to three questions, whom would you question, and what would you ask?
Is there anyone in her life who she hasn’t been able to trust? This will tell you what it is that she questions most deeply in her own life.
101. If you were walking through the forest and you suddenly saw a tiger, what would you do?
Run, freeze, or fight — whichever route she chooses says a lot about how she reacts to life’s stresses.
102. Who had the biggest impact on the person you have become?
Mentors are incredibly important to our development — who has helped her become who she is today?
103. Is there anyone or anything that you’d sacrifice your life for?
Is there a person or a cause that’s more deeply important to her than life itself?
104. What is the most important thing a person can do to improve themselves?
Growing and changing is essential to a deeply fulfilling life. How does she help these processes along?
105. What single event has had the biggest impact on who you are?
Everyone has turning points in their lives; sharing what hers was will bring you to a deeper level of connection.
106. Do you think the future will be better than the present? Why?
Revealing either an optimistic or pessimistic mindset, this question asks of her whether she thinks her own life will get better, as well.
107. What lies do you most often tell yourself?
Everyone deceives themselves to a certain degree, but being aware of this is what helps us grow. Is she aware of her own little lies?
108. What are the most common road blocks that stop people from achieving their dreams?
Discussing your goals and dreams, and what is preventing you from them, helps develop a closer and deeper relationship.
109. What keeps you up at night?
Sharing her worries and anxieties will let her open up more intimately with you.
110. What do a lot of parents do that screws up their kid?
No parent is perfect, and this question gives her a chance to talk about what wasn’t perfect in her childhood.
111. Have you ever questioned the existence of love?
For any relationship to become deeper and more personal, you both have to examine what love means to you. This question lets you do so together.
112. Is there a point in your past that you regret more than anything else?
Our errors make us human. Has she come past the point of feeling guilty for what has happened in her past?
113. When did you have your first kiss?
Her first experience with intimacy may have been positive or challenging, but either way this gives her a chance to talk about it.
114. What do you most want to tell me?
Giving her a direct opportunity to share whatever is in her heart with you opens the door to deep communication.
115. What’s the most crucial thing for a healthy relationship?
After her answer, it’s worth asking whether the two of you engage in this healthy relationship behavior.
116. Do you ever dwell on past occurrences? Would you like to erase certain memories from your mind?
We can learn from the past, but dwelling in it can become dangerous. This question gives her the opportunity to share her regrets on the way to overcoming them.
117. What would you consider the greatest obstacle you’ve ever had to face? How did you overcome it?
Does she have a healthy attitude towards life’s challenges? Give her a chance to share her successes with you with this question.
118. Do you think laughing at someone elses misfortune is wrong?
“Schadenfreude” is the German word for taking delight in suffering. Does she think this emotion is justified?
Here are four powerful tips for how to start a conversation with a girl over text:
Tip #1: Greet Her Warmly and Politely
Before you start asking a girl questions over text, say “hello” in whatever polite way you’d like. Not only does this show that you have manners, it also lets you know that when you receive a message from her, she is actively on her phone. This way, when you ask your question, she will see your message and be more likely to continue the conversation with you.
Tip #2: Have a Goal in Mind
What is it that you’re looking for out of the conversation? If you start with a goal in mind, then you can plan ahead for how to continue the conversation.
Whether you’re looking to build her interest in you, or ask her out on a date with you this weekend, having a clear idea of what you’re looking for will help you plan how to get there.
Tip #3: Ask Questions That Make Her Think
While “how is your day?” may look good on paper, it’s not specific enough to develop an ongoing conversation. Basically, if she can answer the question without thinking, she be less likely to be interested enough to keep texting.
So here’s the deal: Asking her questions that make her think will capture her interest. And you want to be interesting to her, right? This article has great tips from her on how to keep a conversation going.
Tip #4: Gauge the Tone of the Conversation
Look for signs that she’s interested and engaged, like longer responses or happy emoticons, before trying to move on to new questions in your conversation.
Downloadable List of Questions to Ask a Girl Over Text
Looking for More Questions to Ask a Girl Over Text?
With all of these questions at your disposal, you should be totally set to start texting any girl that you’re interested in getting to know better. If you’ve used some of these successfully and are looking for more, we’ve got you covered:
- A lot of questions to ask your girlfriend are just as applicable to a girl that you’re not dating (yet!).
- Need a few questions to throw out there anytime? Check out these random questions to ask a girl.
- Is she hard to impress? Bring out your most interesting questions to ask a girl and break through her hard shell.
With all these great questions to ask, it’s time to pick up your phone and text the girl that you haven’t known how to talk to yet!
These interesting and engaging questions to ask a girl over text will get you half of the way there. The other half is up to you and your unique personality, so don’t be afraid to adjust and improvise these questions as well!