Online dating is such a big thing these days. For first-timers, we will understand flirting and how to be good at it.
As a relationship expert featured in UpJourney and Shondaland, I flirted and got flirted with on my single days. Even now that I am married to my wonderful husband, we still get to flirt to add spice to our marriage.
So yes, flirting moves is for everyone regardless of gender and marital status. We want you to learn the right flirting behavior.
Let the flirtation begin!
What is Flirting? How to Characterize Flirting
Flirting with someone is usually driven by romantic interest and intentions. It can be by delivering a pickup line or making the extra effort to get noticed, such as saying hello or smiling at someone. A flirting interaction, which usually starts with innocent fun and playful, may pave the way for potential romantic relationships.
Types & Stages
5 Types of Flirting
Knowing how to flirt with a girl or a guy is not as simple as you think. Did you know that there are different types of flirting? Sex research reveals a certain flirting style which will help understand how to communicate with high chances of getting liked back.
Here are the 5 different types of flirting:
Men take the lead in traditional flirting, while women have to wait for them to make the first move. It is said that flirting conventionally works best with introverted people. Men who flirt traditionally have eyes for their potential partners for a while now.
Playful flirting is not for the faint-hearted. Some people like to do it to boost their self-esteem. If you want to flirt with someone you potentially want to end up with, playful flirting may not work.
On the contrary, people who sincerely flirt want to establish a connection with their love interests. In other words, sincere flirting is not a game for these people. They mean serious business when it comes to reaching out to their crush.
Physical flirting involves sexual and emotional chemistry between two people. This type of flirting tends to develop faster and leads to romantic relationships.
A polite flirter tends to approach extra caution while ensuring that they get their potential partners' attention. They often use gentleman-like manners, which could be a plus for those who grew up in a conservative home.
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3 Flirting By Stage
Flirting involves a step-by-step process to initiate a potential romantic relationship. You do not just tell someone your name and interest in them unless you want to be labeled a creep. You need to take time when it comes to love.
Here are the 3 steps of flirting you need to know:
Step #1: Approach
First, you have to approach the person you are interested in. The feeling should be mutual, so you can be ensured that the flirtation will progress. Otherwise, get your sorry self out there and move on. Ensure to flash your love interest a genuine, eye-wrinkling smile.
Step #2: Swivel and synchronize
Once you notice progress, it is time to strike a conversation and establish rapport with the other person. You can start with cheesy pickup lines. On the contrary, avoid using lines with sexual or racist tones. Never EVER bring up or compare your potential love interest with an ex.
Step #3: Touch
This phase is important in building a potential relationship and social interaction. Not only does it involve physical touch but also engaging in fun but meaningful conversations. The feeling only becomes mutual if the other person positively reciprocates the touch.
11 Undeniable Signs of Flirtatious Behavior
When you're actively seeking someone to love, it's important to recognize whether someone is flirting with you and has a romantic intention with you.
Here are 11 tell-tale signs a girl is flirting with you:
Sign #1: Extended eye contact
It is said that a prolonged eye gaze means the person is attracted or feels affection towards the other person. Extended eye contact could indicate sexual attraction. However, it could also be a sign a person wants a deeper relationship with you.
Sign #2: A lot of brief glances
Aside from prolonged eye gaze, men direct several brief glances towards a girl they like. Catching a person's gaze could be pure coincidence. But when you notice someone staring at you or catching quick glimpses several times, it could be a sign of flirting.
Sign #3: Moving closer
Actions speak louder than words. Body language attraction is strong, especially when you are near someone you like. You will know if someone has sincere intentions with you. This is why women also need to understand how to attract men without talking.
Sign #4: Casual touches during a conversation
A brush on the arm or an "accidental" foot bump while seated at a table or bar is a subtle sign of flirting. A light touch can send shivers down your spine and signal your brain about attraction. Casual touches can also test your physical and sexual compatibility with the other person.
Sign #5: Responding to touching
If someone moves away from you after a casual touch, the person is either uncomfortable or doesn't like you. But if the person doesn't mind the touch or even reciprocates the move, it means they are also interested in you.
Sign #6: Touching own accessories or hair
Fidgeting with an accessory or twirling with hair is another subtle sign that someone is into you. These are involuntary moves that show interest to another person – and obvious signs at that.
Sign #7: Noticeably different smile
Not everyone who smiles at you is a sign of flirting. It could be the person is simply giving respect and being polite to other people. However, you could tell if someone is romantically interested in you by how they deliver the smile.
Sign #8: Compliments
Receiving compliments is also an obvious sign of flirting. Saying positive things about you – your eyes, smile, outfit, and even how you smell are strong indicators that a person is interested in you. Make sure to avoid sexual or racist compliments, which can turn off someone you like.
Sign #9: Gentle teasing
Teasing but not in a way that will annoy the person, but more adorable and playful. Giving the person some challenge is another subtle sign of flirting.
Sign #10: Cracking jokes
Someone who is into you will find ways to make you laugh. An attempt to crack a joke (whether cringe or funny) is another effective way to flirt with someone you like.
Sign #11: Uses pickup lines
When someone makes the extra effort to make you smile or showcase their sense of humor, these flirty pickup lines can work to your advantage. It is also a way to start a conversation that can lead to something beyond flirting.
7 Fun Facts about Flirting
Flirting may not be for everyone and can make some people awkward and uncomfortable. But for most people, their romantic relationships began with shy glances or an "accidental" touch of their skins.
Flirting can be a start of a wonderful and memorable relationship with a person they like.
Here are 7 fun facts about flirting:
1. Ninety percent of the time, women are the ones who start flirting. However, once flirting is initiated, men are the ones who pursue, not women.
Back in the early days, men often did the chasing while the women... well, they enjoyed the chase. Nowadays, more women are open to making the first move. When they pursue a man they like, it makes it easier for men to make the next move. At least men know their flirting will turn out positively and fruitfully.
2. A smile is the most deceptive facial expression, and there are over 18 different ways to smile. The most attractive smile is the genuine smile, which is the smile that creates lines, or "crow's feet," around the eyes.
It is easy to smile, but making a sincere and from-the-heart smile is another story. According to Duchenne de Bologne, a 17th-century French researcher, the key to a genuine smile is often seen in the eyes. Also, watch out for eye movements, exposure of bottom teeth, and "crow's feet" around the eyes.
3. Body languages can differ from culture to culture, but flirting signs are more transcultural.
Body languages may stem from different cultures and traditions. It may seem normal for the people who grew accustomed to it but might be misinterpreted by others who are not used to it.
For example, in Islamic countries, women are expected to act coy when men approach them. Meanwhile, most Western countries are more open and liberated when flirting.
4. Most attractive people don't necessarily get the most attention. It is almost always the most effective flirters who end up with the most attention.
Good-looking people indeed get more attention than the average Joes and plain Janes. However, experienced flirters use non-verbal cues in seeking attention in their crushes. They take it one step at a time by establishing a connection first and then keeping the other person wanting more.
5. Not only is flirting essential, but it is also a universal form of human interaction.
Most people think flirters are in it just to get laid. Flirting is also a challenging game that can lead to something worthy of a happy ending when you do it right. It makes someone happy and good about themselves. It is also an opportunity to show your intelligence, humor, and wit.
6. Complimenting a woman's lips is the most effective pickup line.
Complimenting a woman's hair, skin, or lips is better and less creepy than commenting how big her butt or boobs are. It could mean that you appreciate how she takes care of herself and makes her feel more womanly and worthy of your attention.
7. Flirtatious people are healthier than non-flirtatious people.
Flirting from time to time boosts one's confidence levels and encourages people to look and feel their best. Casual flirtations can also relieve stress and tension, especially among peers and close friends. In other words, flirting can make people physically, mentally, and emotionally healthy.
Downloadable And Printable List of Flirting Definition
Here is a downloadable and printable jpg/pdf list of what does flirting means right-click the image and select Save Image As...):
Frequently Asked Questions
Some people perceive flirting negatively. However, it is a good way to communicate with someone through words and body language. Still, it takes time to learn the proper way to flirt without looking like a creep. Here are commonly-asked questions about flirting:
What is the meaning of being a flirt?
Flirting involves spoken and written communication and body language, either to amuse oneself or to initiate a deeper connection with the other person. Flirts often use compliments to catch someone's attention. Changes in vocal tone, brief touching, eye contact, and smiling with wrinkling eyes are also signs of flirtation moves.
Is it okay to be a flirt?
It is okay to flirt as long as you know your boundaries. Never comment about someone's boobs or butt, or make sexual comments or jokes unless she is your girlfriend or wife. Timing is also a key in Flirting 101. Test the waters first and see if she responds to your moves.
Do women enjoy being flirted, or does it scare them away?
Yes, women enjoy casual flirting or getting flirted, especially if it's someone they also like. They want the attention and make them feel good about themselves. But if the flirter is someone they do not like, it could turn out as sexual harassment.
To what extent is flirting not accepted in a relationship?
Flirting is fine if you do not compromise your romantic relationship with your partner. If you are a naturally-flirty person, make sure your partner is aware of it. Otherwise, it could be perceived as cheating, and you have to deal with a constantly-jealous partner all the time.
More Awesome Articles To Explore
Flirting is one way to catch one's attention, whether for amusement or to start a romantic connection with the other person. Knowing the best flirting tips will help you get started.
- Do girls like shy guys? Well, it depends. Let's find out here, so you know your next moves.
- It's also a good idea to know the most common turn-offs for women so that you won't make those mistakes and not get the girl you like.
- There are a lot of best ways to approach a girl. Ensure you know what you are doing and keep your eyes on the prize.
There are several ways to understand flirting. Some people may still perceive flirting negatively. However, more and more people start to open up with flirting for fun or create a romantic connection with someone they like.
Flirting should not be taboo anymore. It's time that we become more open to new ways to meet new people and know how to get what we want. It's time that we step out of our comfort zone and take risks if we want to succeed in love.